Recipe for chili

Look, I'll admit: I'm not the best cook by a long shot. Ever since that tragic night at the National Boy Scout Jamboree in 1989, I've been very timid about turning myself loose in the kitchen again. But along with deep-frying turkey and bagna cauda (something I haven't made in quite awhile) this is one dish that I've become rather good at, and other people seem to enjoy it a lot. So I thought that it might be fun to post my chili recipe here.

Credit goes to my aunt, Glendora Roberts, for coming up with this. So it's not really "my" recipe at all. It's just my preferred way of making chili. My only real contribution is the Tabasco sauce and, if you like, the Dave's Ultimate Insanity sauce.

Aunt Glendora's chili (Chris Knight variant)

- 1 pound of ground chuck
- 1 cup of water
- 3-4 tablespoons of chili powder
- Bottle of ketchup
- Bottle of original Tabasco brand Pepper Sauce
- Salt
- 1/2 teaspoon sugar
- Bottle of Dave's Ultimate Insanity hot sauce (OPTIONAL)

Chop up the ground chuck very finely in a pot. Add water. Turn on the stove to low-medium and brown the chuck. Add chili powder and 2-3 good squirts of ketchup. Pour in 3-5 generous dollops of Tabasco sauce. Pour it a pinch of salt. Mix well. Turn the stove down and let chili simmer very low for an hour until thick. Stir occasionally. Add sugar toward the end.

OPTIONAL: For extra-spicy chili, pour in one drop of Dave's Ultimate Insanity hot sauce while simmering. Mix this very well! Do not use Dave's Ultimate Insanity sauce if you are also cooking dinner for your wife and you do not wish to be threatened with divorce.

Enjoy! :-)