By Crom! Schwarzenegger making a new Conan movie!

(And just to be clear, Ah-nuldt is not playing Conan O'Brien.)

Personally, I think this is ten years too late. Wanna know why? Because sometime before 9/11 happened there was serious work afoot to make a true sequel to 1982's Conan the Barbarian: one that would forget that Conan the Destroyer ever happened. King Conan: Crown of Iron had a script written by John Milius and was going to be produced by the Wachowski Brothers (back when the Wachowskis were still brothers, that's all I'm gonna say).

I was able to read the King Conan: Crown of Iron script several years ago. It was spot-on perfect as a follow-up to Conan the Barbarian. It even had Conan saying another prayer to Conan. My favorite part though took place at the beginning of the story: a scene paralleling the one from the original of Conan's father speaking to Conan about the riddle of steel. This script had Conan talking to his son about steel, and how Junior would one day have to break Conan's sword, just as Conan broke his father's sword in the first movie.

Brilliant stuff. And it would have made a hella good movie... had Arnold Schwarzenegger not going off to be Governor of California.

I don't know if this is gonna atone for King Conan: Crown of Iron not getting produced. But it's something anyway: Arnold Schwarzenegger is going to return as Conan in the just-announced The Legend of Conan, set for release in 2014. This is meant to be the proper sequel to Conan the Barbarian, which ended with a lingering scene several years later of Conan sitting on a throne and Mako's voice promising us that "this story shall also be told."

(Hey, better thirty-two years late than never, huh?)

Slash here for more at GeekTyrant.com.