10 warning signs of spiritual abuse (and cult leadership)

Found a very intriguing and insightful post on Mary DeMuth's blog. Titled "Spiritual Abuse: 10 Ways to Spot It", DeMuth writes about her experiences with "churches and ministries that bully".

Here are some of the indicators of spiritual abuse, in whatever form it might take...

- Have a distorted view of respect. They forget the simple adage that respect is earned, not granted. Abusive leaders demand respect without having earned it by good, honest living.

- Demand allegiance as proof of the follower’s allegiance to Christ. It’s either his/her way or no way. And if a follower deviates, he is guilty of deviating from Jesus.

- Use exclusive language. “We’re the only ministry really following Jesus.” “We have all the right theology.” Believe their way of doing things, thinking theologically, or handling ministry and church is the only correct way. Everyone else is wrong, misguided, or stupidly naive.

- Buffer him/herself from criticism by placing people around themselves whose only allegiance is to the leader. Views those who bring up issues as enemies. Those who were once friends/allies swiftly become enemies once a concern is raised. Sometimes these folks are banished, told to be silent, or shamed into submission.

- Hold to outward performance but rejects authentic spirituality. Places burdens on followers to act a certain way, dress an acceptable way, and have an acceptable lifestyle.

- Use exclusivity for allegiance. Followers close to the leader or leaders feel like insiders. Everyone else is on the outside, though they long to be in that inner circle.

I can unfortunately think of any number of people who fit these descriptions plenty. Who fit all of them, even.

Reading over DeMuth's article, I felt led to consider again what it means to be a follower of Christ and what sincere Christian leadership entails. I really have to credit a lot of good people that God put into my life over the years (especially during those first crazy few when I began my walk with Christ) from whom I came to understand a notion that is completely at odds with the ways of the world: namely, that to serve Christ first and to serve others best means to put self last. In fact, the ideal of Christian leadership is that person who not only recognizes that he or she is imperfect, but indeed readily acknowledges that reality. To follow Christ and serve others is to crucify self, as opposed to aggrandizing self.

That is the reason, I have to believe, why the most respected and admired servants of Christ that most come to mind, are also the most humble and selfless. Those are the men and women who daily strive to let self die, so that Christ within them might radiate forth ever more brilliantly. It is the ones who take pains to point to themselves most who in turn point away from Christ.

Anyhoo, it's a great essay by Mary DeMuth, and I felt led to turn y'all's attention to it :-)

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T-shirts at the Tuscon memorial service?

Does anyone else think that this was crass at best and beyond pale at worst?

To the left you will see a few of the 20,000-some "Together We Thrive" t-shirts that were given away free as "souvenirs" - and that's being more charitable than it deserves to be called - at last night's memorial service for victims of this past week's massacre in Tuscon.

I didn't watch it on television but a number of people whose reports I have long come to trust have shared a common sentiment: that last night's event was a meandering mess of narcissistic narcolepsy... with President Barack Obama as the focal point.

(What's the story about this Native American medicine man that I'm hearing so much bad about?)

Free t-shirts for attending a memorial service supposedly held in honor of those who died in an act of violence. I defy anyone to articulate how this was at all appropriate.

And I'm also a mite curious as to who paid for those t-shirts...

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Personality cults do not exist in this dojo

A contented life of liberty is one lived with no concern or regard whatsoever about what either Barack Obama or Sarah Palin did today.

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Sarah Palin's daughter Bristol to hit paid lecture circuit

The more that I've examined the so-called Sarah Palin "phenomenon" the less impressed I have become with the former Alaska governor. My respect for her would shoot through the stratosphere if Palin would completely ditch the Republican Party machine and seriously "go rogue". But as it is she's too beholden to the ones who "brung her to the dance".

But the biggest reason why I'm tremendously leery of Sarah Palin isn't so much with the lady herself as it is with her followers... and what Palin isn't doing to put the brakes on what she has become: a cult of personality.

I despise cults of personality. Lord knows we've seen too many of them in this country in recent years. The cult of personality surrounding George W. Bush was abominable. It might have been even worse than the one engendered by Barack Obama. The United States has suffered three consecutive administrations of Presidents with severe narcissistic disorders: God knows we don't need another.

Now comes word that Sarah Palin's daughter, Bristol Palin, is about to hit the road as a paid speaker. Price per appearance: between $15,000 and $30,000.

I don't know what's more sad: that young Bristol's qualifications for the lucrative lecture circuit comprise of little more than being her mother's daughter and getting knocked-up, or that I know fully well that there will be gads of people who will pay good money to see her talk.

Like I said: cult of personality. And there's plenty of $$$ to be made from it.

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