Photos from my Florida odyssey

I needed this trip, severely.  Looking in the mirror this morning, I barely recognize the guy who set off eleven days ago on what became over a week in Florida.  It's not the face of the Chris who's spent most of the past several months in grief over the passing of a parent, or in frustration of other things that have tested my perseverance.

Sometimes you need to step away from things and give God some elbow room to work His way on your life.  I have been so focused on writing my book and the hard wall of progress I've been hitting since late February, so trapped by the four walls of my living room and too many times bouts of depression, that those had become the only substantial elements of my life.  And that's not right at all.

For sake of myself, the book, everything... I had to get away from all of that.  And I think that the book project is going to be helped immensely by this.  I consider going to Florida to be the first part of a two-course "treatment" for my problems in writing the book.  The second part is going to be soon, when a friend is going to help me go through some material from over the years.

But this journey really was the thing that my life needed most right now.  I'm very thankful that I got to make this trip.  And I've got some photos to prove that I was there!

Very Beach, Florida's ummmm... beach?

Not a beach bum.  Just a bum.  On a beach.

Lauryn and her boyfriend Matt.  Yes, this is THAT Lauryn that I've posted pictures of
on this blog over the years.  The one that a LOT of guys have asked me about if she's single.
 Sorry to disappoint y'all :-P

Me and "Uncle Bob".
Okay, he's actually my cousin.  How he came to be "Uncle Bob" is one of those stories
that the family is always going to be laughing about :-)

On the streets of West Palm Beach.

Aunt Billie and Bob.
I used to own a pair of plaid blue shorts exactly like that.
They look better on Bob than on me.

City Place in West Palm Beach.
One of the nicest uses of real estate that I've ever seen by any town.
Hard to believe this beautiful promenade of shops and social areas
used to be brothels and crack houses until the city razed it all down.

Me with the car that I'm going to get when my book
becomes a multi-million copy bestseller (yah right!)

The most criminally CREEPY restroom in the history of anything.
This is at an ice cream shop in City Place in West Palm Beach.
The way it's SUPPOSED to work is that a person goes inside, hits a switch
and the window fogs up and becomes completely opaque.
But as Bob and I discovered when one unfortunate young woman was using
this restroom, that was NOT the case.  We saw everything.  Yes, that's Bob
inside the restroom on the other side of the window.  I'm standing where
a table and some chairs are situated.  Of course we notified the staff
but Lord only knows how long this thing had been broken.  WHY was
such a thing made like that anyway?

My cousin Cheryl and I in front of her brand new car:
the "Starship Indigo".
The Batmobile ain't got nuthin' on the technology this baby has.

My second cousin Angela and one of her two children.
Well, one of her two children at the moment: she and her husband are
expecting another soon!

Angela's other kid.
Doing what all boys should do sooner or later: handle a real live snake.

Of course, I had to get in on some of that action too :-)

Read More

Dear people of Jacksonville, Florida...

Driving south down I-95, your stretch of which must be the most treacherous length of interstate in the continental United States.  The GPS blaring red alerts of "stay in the left lane" practically the entire time from the Georgia border until well past town.  Hopped-up on Dr. Pepper and Lindsey Stirling's "Shatter Me" playing over the car stereo.

It was one of the most crazy awesome experiences I've ever had as a driver.  But please... please... do something about that highway.  A lot of the time I could barely tell where one lane ended and the other began.  You guys are one confused motorist away from a collisional calamity of crippling proportions.

Looks like a pretty nice town though.  Maybe next time I'll stop for a bite to eat there.

Read More

George Zimmerman: NOT GUILTY

Breaking news on, I think every TV station in the land right now.

George Zimmerman: found Not Guilty

Justice was served.  And I'm going to tell you why...

George Zimmerman has been found not guilty of murdering Trayvon Martin because the prosecution in this case either had NO real evidence whatsoever, or they were the most incompetent team of prosecutors in the history of anything.  Too many times it seemed as if the prosecutors were scoring points for the defense!

Either way, justice was done in this matter.  The burden is on the prosecution to prove guilt, not on the defendant to prove innocence.  And the prosecution came nowhere close to meeting that burden.

Read More

Man arrested for releasing red helium balloons for girlfriend

Found a rather strange story about Anthony Brasfield, who was arrested by the Florida Highway Patrol on a felony charge.

His crime: releasing a dozen or so red and silver heart-shaped balloons into the sky for his girlfriend.

From the article at Sun-Sentinel.com...

Also watching the romantic gesture: an FHP trooper, who instead noted probable cause for an environmental crime.

Brasfield was charged with polluting to harm humans, animals, plants, etc. under the Florida Air and Water Pollution Control Act.

Endangered marine turtle species and birds, such as wood storks and brown pelicans, seek refuge in John U. Lloyd State Park, about 1.5 miles east of the motel.

Between 2008 and 2012, the Florida Department of Law Enforcement said there were 21 arrests statewide under the rarely used environmental crime statute. The third-degree felony is punishable by up to five years in prison.

Five years in prison for setting loose some cheap helium balloons? He should feel lucky. Back in the old days, releasing red balloons into the air could possibly trigger World War III.


I'll 'fess up: in addition to this being a screwy story about environmentalism gone amok, I just wanted a reason to post Nena's "99 Red Balloons" video.

(And yes, I know the original German title is "99 Luftballons"...)

Read More

Somebody voted for me for President!

Hey, I got a write-in vote from Florida for the office of President of the United States!

Not a joke: that is a real ballot a friend turned in this afternoon. I doubt I'll win but hey, at least someone thinks I'm more qualified for the job than Roseanne Barr. That's... something, I suppose!

As for my own vote for President:

There it is. That's it. The space on my ballot for President was left unmarked. Untouched. Unsoiled. As virgin as the wind-driven snow.

I had thought of writing in "Rufus T. Firefly". Until a wise friend convinced me today that a write-in vote for a fictitious character or anything like that would have been just as waste of a vote as those who blindly vote straight-ticket. That a much more morally powerful vote would be to choose not to participate in that particular madness at all.

Wanna know what most led me to not vote for anyone at all?

I believe in the sanctity and preciousness of human life. I believe that nothing has done more irreparable damage to our value of the soul than abortion. It is as Mother Teresa of Calcutta said: "The greatest destroyer of peace is abortion... And if we accept that a mother can kill even her own child, how can we tell other people not to kill one another?" and "Any country that accepts abortion, is not teaching its people to love, but to use any violence to get what it wants."

I cannot vote for Barack Obama because of his steadfast belief that innocent human life can be destroyed out of "choice".

Nor could I vote for Mitt Romney because he has gone on record many, MANY times as likewise believing that abortion should be upheld and even protected. Enough times in fact that I can not and do not trust his very convenient "conversion" on the issue prior to running for President. "Pro-life" George W. Bush had a "pro-life" Congress to work with... and they did NOTHING about abortion but token gestures!

I brook no doubt that Romney will/would be doing just as much.

And I am not entirely comfortable with Gary Johnson's position on the matter either.

So this afternoon, since were no candidates who I could feel confident enough about trusting my vote with, voted for no one for President.

My hands are clean and tonight my conscience is absolutely clear.

It can not be said that I "wasted" my vote.

And neither can it be said that I lent my consent toward this country's being apparently hellbent toward colossal ruin.

But I'm still honored that in the state of Florida, however miniscule it might be, that someone was willing to put their faith in me as President :-)

Read More

For the children: "trashcan cameras" and location-tracking chips

In the wake of American schoolkids rebelling against the federal government's new school lunch rules, a school district in Florida is considering installing video cameras on its school cafeteria trashcans so it can monitor and determine if students are throwing away their vegetables.

Meanwhile the students of Northside Independent School District in Texas are being told to wear ID badges containing location-tracking radio chips on penalty of "suspension, fines, or being involuntary transferred".

Here's an idea: the students should go ahead and wear the badges, but only after putting them in their microwave ovens for a minute or two. THAT oughtta scramble the innards enough to make them useless!

Some good commentary by Fred Reed - the Internet's finest curmudgeon - about the growing "Eye of Sauron" over us, which you can read here.

Read More

Man dies after roach-eating contest (but he won!)

Renfield had the right idea at least: if you're gonna eat bugs, give it some variety!

Edward Archbold, age 32, is dead after eating "dozens of roaches and worms" in a pet store's contest in Deerfield Beach, Florida.

From the article at The Smoking Gun...

Investigators reported that Archbold "wasn’t feeling well and began to regurgitate" shortly after the contest's conclusion. "He had consumed dozens of roaches and worms," a sheriff’s spokesman noted.

Archbold was pronounced dead after being transported to an area hospital. An autopsy was conducted, and the Broward County medical examiner is awaiting test results to determined Archbold's cause of death.

The roach eating contest was part of the reptile store's October 5 "Midnight Madness" sale. Contestants had four minutes to devour the most discoid roaches, which can grow up to three inches long. "Oh yeah, any vomiting is an automatic DQ," the store cautioned in a Facebook post prior to the revolting competition.The roach eating contest was part of the reptile store's October 5 "Midnight Madness" sale. Contestants had four minutes to devour the most discoid roaches, which can grow up to three inches long. "Oh yeah, any vomiting is an automatic DQ," the store cautioned in a Facebook post prior to the revolting competition.

However, Archbold did win the contest. The grand prize was a live python.

Wouldn't surprise me if this pet shop got hit with a lawsuit of some kind. And if it's not liable, well... I just can't see eating even one roach for anything, much less an exotic snake.

Read More

Giant LEGO minifig washes ashore in Florida

An eight-foot tall LEGO "minifigure" was found on the beach at Siesta Key Village, Florida earlier this week...

From the story at Boing Boing...

Boing Boing reader Jeff Hindman says he chanced across a "giant Legoman washed ashore" today while strolling on the beach at Siesta Key Village, Fla.

"It is very big, about 8 ft. tall," Hindman said. " ... I worked with Lego in my younger days, but this piece is amazing, it's still there on the beach."

A photo of the creature shows it beached on a sandbank, in otherwise good condition. On its chest is the message, "No real than you are."

This suggests it has the same origin as Lego men who washed ashore in Zandvoort, Holland, three years ago, and then in Brighton, England.

Doesn't look like the LEGO man is in any distress from his ordeal. I mean, look at how big his smile is :-P

Read More

All this blogger is gonna say about the Casey Anthony murder trial

Just three things:

First, I admit that I didn't follow this trial at all up until Tuesday when the verdict was reached and announced. When that happened it was darn near impossible to read anything but about it. So I took it upon myself to study the case and now that some of the jurors have broken their anonymity and begun talking about it...

I have to say that the jurors reached the best verdict that they possibly could. And when some of them say that it anguished them that this was their verdict, I have to take them at their word.

Do I believe that Casey Anthony murdered her 2-year old daughter Caylee Anthony? My answer would be "Is there anybody who seriously believes that O.J. didn't do it?"

But in our legal system, the burden is on the prosecution to prove guilt beyond any reasonable doubt. Not the defendant to prove his or her innocence. And in the end, based on the evidence produced by the prosecutors, the jury could not find that Casey Anthony was indeed guilty beyond any reasonable doubt.

Nobody should be angry at the jury. And their verdict must be honored and respected. Don't blame the jurors. They were only doing their job.

Second: this entire case demonstrated something that I have believed for years. That being: television cameras DO NOT BELONG in a court of law.

I've sat as a spectator in a courtroom before on numerous occasions. I've watched court proceedings on television. And the two couldn't be more different than night and day. It was the Blanche Taylor Moore trial back in 1990 that first popped the red flag, even though I was just a high school junior. Moore, on trial for murdering a whole buncha men in her life with arsenic, was just about the biggest trial this state had seen in a heap o' years. The publicity was so great that the venue was moved from Alamance County (where Moore resided) to Forsyth County. TV cameras were rolling in the courtroom. Moore was convicted and sentenced to death (she's still on death row today) and nobody thought she'd get off. But even so: the spectacle of the lead prosecutor crying in open court - along with numerous other incidents - was ridiculous. It was posturing before the cameras and everyone knew it.

Then came the O.J. Simpson trial. 'Nuff said.

It's like this: the presence of a camera in any situation... it alters the situation. The thing about how observing a thing changes that thing? It's no more true than in human events... and perhaps in no greater severity than in a courtroom during a high-profile murder trial.

Look, I'm not saying that trials shouldn't be public. They absolutely must be. Public trial is a safeguard of both due process and the defendant's rights.

A public trial is not a sideshow for our gawking pleasure. And that is what live television cameras turned the O.J. Simpson trial into and now the Casey Anthony trial.

The purpose of a trial in criminal court of law is to determine the guilt or innocence of the defendant. Throw a TV camera into the room and psychologically everyone involved in the trial realizes that they're part of a show in addition to a legal proceeding. Leave it to human nature to choose which one is inclined to get the bigger priority.

See what I'm getting at?

The prosecutors knew that this would be a highly publicized murder trial (for all the wrong reasons, but I digress...). The responsible thing would have been to insist upon no television cameras at all, and to petition that request to the judge in the interest of a fair and complete hearing. Then the prosecutors would have been free to focus on the trial and not the presence of the cameras.

Think I'm wrong? That's at least two murder trials watched on live television by millions of people. Each of them resulted in verdicts of "not guilty", in defiance of what was apparently an incredible amount of evidence indicating otherwise.

It can be hard to say no to a television camera when it's aimed at you. But sometimes, it's for the best.

And third...

If Casey Anthony murdered her child, there will be justice. Of that, I have no doubt.

I thought the same thing when Simpson was found not guilty. I remember telling a friend at the time, "He won't get away. Don't worry. Maybe in ways that we'll never see or ever know, O.J. will be punished for what he did."

Today O.J. Simpson is sitting in a prison in Nevada, stemming from a crime completely unrelated to the murders of his ex-wife and her friend. But still, whenever I think of Simpson going free that fall day in 1995 and where he is now...

God is not mocked. And what justice escapes our meager human wisdom and understanding, He will not and can not be loathe to let evade from His sight.

If Casey Anthony killed her daughter, she will be brought to a reckoning. Maybe not to our immediate satisfaction...

...but that will be a matter left between her and the highest Judge of all.

Read More

Les Misérables: Women steal 75 deodorant sticks, as pet cemeteries ordered to stop burying humans

In the state of New York a government agency is ordering pet cemeteries to cease and desist with interring the cremated remains of human pet owners with their beloved dogs and cats.

Meanwhile in Fort Pierce, Florida (I happen to have lots of family there) two women were taped by video surveillance at a Winn Dixie supermarket stealing seventy-five sticks of deodorant. Police figure the ladies will try to sell the deodorant to convenience stores.

Not the craziest stories that I've heard lately, but certainly worth passing along for your mirth and merriment :-P

Read More

Hurricane Katrina hit New Orleans five years ago

Five years ago tonight was when Hurricane Katrina roared ashore and beat the city of New Orleans to within an inch of its life. The photo is a now-famous one taken of the storm surge as Katrina made landfall.

Katrina started out life on August 23rd, 2005 as a tropical system in the southeastern Bahamas. It did substantial damage and caused a number of deaths as it went across the Florida peninsula. And then Katrina entered the warm waters of the Gulf of Mexico... where it became the monster that would ultimately cause the worst natural disaster in American history.

Five years later and Katrina is being debated as hotly as ever. I thought at the time that the situation became one of the worst clusterf-cks ever for government at all levels (and both major parties, mind ya).

But there were also quite a lot of stories about the positive aspects of human nature as well that came out of Katrina. The tale of Jabbar Gibson - the 20-year old who stole a schoolbus to evacuate fellow New Orleans residents to the Houston Astrodome - was one of my favorites. So too was the bar in the French Quarter that never closed. And then there was the photograph of Nita LaGarde, 105 years old and in a wheelchair, holding hands with Tanisha Blevin, the 5-year old granddaughter of her nurse. LaGarde and Blevin had spent two days trapped in the attic of a house as the flood waters rose before being rescued.

(I still think that the Interdictor blog is going to make for one helluva movie someday, with the right screenplay and director behind it.)

There is something dreadfully fascinating about hurricanes. And if you were reading The Knight Shift at the time you'll remember well how, ummm... nuts I went in writing about Katrina.

Let us hope and pray that another such opportunity will be a long, long time in returning.

Read More

Man arrested for phone sex calls... to 911

The Smoking Gun has published the mug shot and police report of one Joshua Basso, a Florida man who's currently in the pokey after making numerous telephone calls to a woman, asking crude questions about her breast size and then queried her about engaging in erotic activities.

That's gonna land him in court for sure. Except that Basso also made all of his calls to 911. There's gonna be a bunch more charges against him for abusing the 911 system.

Why did he do it? Basso claimed that his LG cell phone was out of minutes and that he "called 911 because it was free".

This guy wasn't just stupid: he was stoopid!

Read More

Woman calls 911 three times about Chicken McNuggets

"This is an emergency, my McNuggets are an emergency." That was the rationale proffered by one Latreasa L. Goodman, 27, of Fort Pierce, Florida. Last week Goodman went into a McDonald's restaurant and ordered a 10-piece Chicken McNuggets. She paid the money but was then told that the location was out of McNuggets. The staff offered her a McDouble but she didn't want that.

So Goodman called 911 and reported the "emergency". And not once, but three times. She's now due in court on a charge of misusing the 911 service.

If Goodman caused this much trouble over McNuggets, then thank Heaven she didn't go nuts after being told the McRib had gone away again.

Read More

Banker gives $60 million of own money to his employees

Lately it seems like the "feel good" stories have become even more few and far between. So when one is found, I feel more than a little compelled to give it a shout-out.

Take, f'rinstance, what Leonard Abess Jr. did. Back in November he sold a majority share of his holdings in Miami-based City National Bancshares.

And then, Abess gave away $60 million of the profits to EVERYONE that was on his bank's payroll. He even went so far as to find 72 former employees so that he could give them a share of the money, too. More than 400 people got the "bonuses", and depending on how long they had been employed some got more than $100,000

This is an awesome story of capitalism and corporate responsibility, folks. And when I say "responsibility", what I mean by that is a company or business owner going above and beyond in rewarding its employees - who have already shown loyalty to the company - without it being mandated by some decree of government. Nobody made Abess give up his own money. In my opinion, Leonard Abess Jr. made a smart investment in his own company. And I'd be willing to wager an RC Cola and a Moon Pie that City National Bancshares might be among the better managed banks in this day and age.

Abess didn't publicize his good deed, but it was inevitable that news of it would get out. When asked about his motivation...

Abess said he had long dreamed of a way to reward employees. He had been thinking of creating an employee stock option plan before he decided to sell the bank.

"Those people who joined me and stayed with me at the bank with no promise of equity -- I always thought some day I'm going to surprise them," he said. "I sure as heck don't need [the money]."

Leonard Abess Jr., you're a good man. And you deserve a tip o' the hat for your good deed :-)

Read More

Man gets over 50 traffic citations... in one day!

Elvis Alonzo Barrett of Boynton Beach, Florida has learned the hard way: real life is not like Grand Theft Auto IV.

This past week Barrett fled police who were already trying to ticket him for one traffic violation. He led authorities on a high-speed chase that had him running through red lights, crashing into another car and then a fence. When he was finally caught, he was also found in possession of a quantity of crack cocaine.

When the final tally came in, Barrett had racked up more than FIFTY traffic citations in a single day, including one for not wearing a seat belt. He was also driving with a suspended license.

I wonder if the cops missed any. I mean, after thirty or forty citations it's hard to keep up...

Read More

Disney has new business: munitions!

Walt Disney World has declared that its employees will be exempt from a new Florida law allowing citizens of that state to keep personal firearms locked in their cars while at work.

And how exactly does a company like Disney - which is Florida's largest single-site employer - get around law like that?

By taking advantage of a loophole that was added to the bill just as it was approved as legislation that "creates an exception for companies whose primary business is to manufacture, use, store or transport explosives regulated under federal law."

Since Walt Disney World has a permit for the vast arsenal of fireworks it keeps on its grounds for its famous pyrotechnics shows, the company is construing that this exception can apply to them and is thus legally declaring their company to be a munitions dealer!

Maybe Disney can transfer John Locke from its Buena Vista division to oversee its new operations. After all, "You never know when a little C4 might come in handy." :-P

Read More

Florida city will seize your home over a $5 parking ticket (and my e-mail to them)

If you're a regular reader of this blog, you may have noticed that I haven't been posting much "heavy" stuff of late here. There are several reasons for that. Not the least of which is that I've been playing around with a new blog: one that's going to be completely dedicated to something that's absolutely serious. Stuff like what I'm posting about now is going to be going there when it's ready (and I'll just make links to them from here when I post on there so both of my loyal readers can find them). But in the meantime...

The city council of Brooksville, Florida has voted this week to foreclose on the houses of people who don't pay their parking tickets. Yes you read that right: don't pay a $5 parking ticket and the town of Brooksville will kick you out of house and home. Here's the full story:

Florida: City to Seize Homes Over a $5 Parking Ticket
Brooksville, Florida proposes to foreclose homes and seize cars over less than $20 in parking tickets.

The city council in Brooksville, Florida voted this week to advance a proposal granting city officials the authority to place liens and foreclose on the homes of motorists accused of failing to pay a single $5 parking ticket. Non-homeowners face having their vehicles seized if accused of not paying three parking offenses.

According to the proposed ordinance, a vehicle owner must pay a parking fine within 72 hours if a meter maid claims his automobile was improperly parked, incurring tickets worth between $5 and $250. Failure to pay this amount results in the assessment of a fifty-percent "late fee." After seven days, the city will place a lien on the car owner's home for the amount of the ticket plus late fees, attorney fees and an extra $15 fine. The fees quickly turn a $5 ticket into a debt worth several hundred dollars, growing at a one-percent per month interest rate. The ordinance does not require the city to provide notice to the homeowner at any point so that after ninety days elapse, the city will foreclose. If the motorist does not own a home, it will seize his vehicle after the failure to pay three parking tickets.

Any motorist who believes a parking ticket may have been improperly issued must first pay a $250 "appeal fee" within seven days to have the case heard by a contract employee of the city. This employee will determine whether the city should keep the appeal fee, plus the cost of the ticket and late fees, or find the motorist not guilty. Council members postponed a decision on whether to reduce this appeal fee until final adoption of the measure which is expected in the first week of April.

This is a crazier scam than the red-light cameras ever were.

It honked me off enough when I read this, that I just now fired off the following e-mail to the entire City Council of Brooksville, Florida:

From: Chris Knight (theknightshift@gmail.com)
To: dpugh@ci.brooksville.fl.us,
fburnett@ci.brooksville.fl.us, jbernardini@ci.brooksville.fl.us, lbradburn@ci.brooksville.fl.us, rlewis@ci.brooksville.fl.us
Subject:Voting to seize homes over $5 parking tickets

Dear members of the City Council of Brooksville, Florida:

Claire Wolfe wrote some years ago that "America is at that awkward stage. It's too late to work within the system, but too early to shoot the bastards."

By voting to seize the homes of people who don't pay a $5 parking ticket, you are making it "that time" more than you realize.

Just a friendly word of caution from someone who has spent his life studying history.

sincerely,
Chris Knight
Reidsville, North Carolina

p.s.: your website is an eyesore.
p.p.s.: I sure as hell will never spend any of my money in your town if I were to visit Florida.

It probably won't do any good: these people and too many others are a little too drunk on their own power. They're past the point of rational thinking.

Maybe it's time for a good ol'-fashioned tar-and-feathering?

Read More