Brittany gets engaged! Reidsville's bachelors weep!

Anytime someone I know gets engaged, it gets celebrated on this blog. Three years ago it was my longtime friend and collaborator "Weird" Ed Woody (and if you want to read up about the alligators and everything else that happened at their wedding mash here). Then a few short months ago it was Jenna Olwin's turn. Now late tonight comes word that a dear friend and fellow freedom-fighter in the cause against school uniforms is the latest to get popped with The Question(tm)...

Congratulations to Brittany Gibson (note: this file photograph of Brittany is not meant to be representative of the moment immediately following becoming a pre-nup) who a few days ago was proposed to by Curtis Wilson and she immediately affirmed the lad's request!

Brittany, yer a fine young lady, and I pray that God will bestow all His blessings upon you and Curtis as you begin the trek toward your new life together.

And if you invite me to the wedding, I promise that I won't arrange for any dancing chimps this time...

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I'm going to Butt-Numb-A-Thon!

I've been able to share the good news with enough people on this end, so I might as well post it here too (especially since I promised that I would on the post about yesterday's wedding/car crash)...

Yesterday morning, around 4:30 a.m., I discovered that I made the list to attend this year's Butt-Numb-A-Thon in Austin, Texas!

What is Butt-Numb-A-Thon? It's an annual film festival in Austin, sponsored by the website Ain't It Cool News and hosted by site creator Harry Knowles (and here is it's entry on Wikipedia). It's a 24-hour long (sometimes a bit more) movie event, and this will be the ninth one ever since Harry started it in 1999. The whole thing is a neat fund-raiser that supports stuff for children. Butt-Numb-A-Thon used to be held at the now-legendary original Alamo Drafthouse. This will be the first one held at the new Alamo Drafthouse Cinema at the Ritz.

As for what is shown at Butt-Numb-A-Thon: it's the most maddening melange of movie mayhem that you can possibly imagine! There's some older, more vintage stuff (I am seriously hoping and praying that Harry will include Mother, Jugs and Speed on this year's program 'cuz that is the perfect movie for a Butt-Numb-A-Thon crowd) but Butt-Numb-A-Thon (or BNAT as it's also known as) has become rather world-famous for having the first public showings of a lot of big movies... and sometimes months before they get wide release! At Butt-Numb-A-Thon in 2003 Peter Jackson was on-hand to premiere The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King and the final film of the show was The Passion of the Christ (with Mel Gibson himself in attendance). Last year's crowd got to see Zack Snyder come and he brought 300 with him. The year before that, they got to see V for Vendetta.

Anyhoo, I'm insanely delighted that I'm getting to go this year! To be considered to be in the audience, you have to fill out an application that's loaded with weird questions. One of them for this year was "Celebrity sexual fantasy?". I answered "Betty Rubble (from the cartoons not the live-action movie!)". You also had to send two photos of yourself, including one of you in costume. So I used this screengrab from WFMY's report on the July 9th school board meeting...

(So if we didn't have to fight so hard against the school uniforms, does this mean that I might never have had this to send in to try to get into Butt-Numb-A-Thon? Could it be that board member/admitted thief Ron Price is greatly responsible for my sudden good fortune?! Who knows... but it's fun to contemplate :-)

Just applying for Butt-Numb-A-Thon can be a fun lil' activity. And I've been playing at it pretty much every year since 2000...

...And now, I'm finally getting to go and I'm extremely thankful for it! After all the craziness that's gone on during the past 12 months and more, this is going to be a very nice way to help wind down 2007 on an upbeat, happy note :-)

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This is already one of the best days I've had in a LONG time!

Later today, my cousin Meg is getting married. I can't tell you how much I've been looking forward to this. She and John are really, beautifully in love with each other and they are going to have a wonderful life together. And I've been hearing for the past few weeks that this is going to be a very wild wedding! I'll try to post pictures later.

But already, at 5:30 in the morning, this is shaping up to be an awesome day.

I'm going to postpone explaining exactly why today is so awesome until later, when I can have the pleasure of telling a few people and hearing their reaction (no, Lisa isn't pregnant... yet). Let's just say that this is something that I've been trying to do for a way long time, and as of this morning, success is finally in sight!

And what you see in this image has a lot to do with it...

More later :-)

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Ron Price is a monument to all our sins

I really hate to say this, but righteous anger is something that has always helped me feel more creative so far as parody goes. If there's something wrong out there in the world, I do what I can to point it out and try to make it right, using whatever talent that God has given me... and in a way that I hope will make people both laugh and think about things.

So now that Rockingham County Board of Education member Ron Price is apparently trying to start-up the school uniforms thing again, my creative juices have gone into overdrive. A lot of ideas have come to mind in the past day or so regarding the Piedmont's #1 larcenous elected official.

Here's my latest work: Ron Price as the Gravemind in a piece inspired by the Halo video game series...

It was a bit hard to do, because Gravemind is one of the most undefinable objects that I've ever seen in a visual medium (no I haven't played Halo 3 yet so maybe he'll look better in that). But I still like how this turned out. And since Gravemind is the power-hungry, conniving central conscience of the Flood, I thought that the parallel to Ron Price was all the more appropriate :-)

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Ron Price tells student she has "misunderstanding", is "dead serious" about bringing back uniforms issue

Time for another hair-rending chapter in the can't-end-soon-enough chronicles of...

As was reported here last Monday night, at this month's meeting of the Rockingham County Board of Education, Ron Price - who almost a year ago was caught stealing campaign signs on the night before the election and has since gone on to become the most arrogant and condescending school board member at least since consolidation took place 14 years ago - tried to get the board to put Standard Mode Of Dress (SMOD) aka "school uniforms" back on the table for discussion. Because there should be "policies" already in place if SMOD is ever approved, Price tried to explain.

In spite of everything that happened at the July meeting, Price actually had the nerve to bring up SMOD again. For sake of "guidelines" he claimed.

But is Ron Price insane enough to try to once again force this on parents and students?

It seems so, according to what Brittany Gibson - a student at Reidsville High and one of the members of POTSMOD (People Opposed To Standard Mode Of Dress) - has told me. Last night Gibson was at the Rockingham County Board of Commissioners meeting and Ron Price happened to be there. She gave me permission to post her e-mails here so I'll let her put it in her own words...

Hey Chris,
This is the response I got back from Ron Price. Pretty much he tried to make me sound like I didn't understand the board's July 9th vote and the Constitution. We both know better than that! I went to the County Commissioner's meeting last night and he and I had a little "run in." It wasn't pleasant. He is dead serious about bringing SMOD back and I'm not having it! Please forward this to POTSMOD and let them know. Hope all is well with you!
Thanks, Brittany

Here is the original e-mail that Gibson sent to Ron Price after last week's meeting...

Dear Mr. Price,

After tonight's meeting, you have raised a few questions for me. First of all, I don't understand why SMOD was added to tonight's agenda. Did you add this? I wasn't present, but one of the members of the audience that was there said that you added it to the agenda. Let me be frank, I feel like this is a very sneaky thing to do. I don't understand why it's necessary to ever talk about this subject again. The board voted to not have uniforms now or ever -- to my knowledge. I, along with many others, spent a lot of time and energy getting rid of the horrible idea of uniforms. I vividly remember Mr. Scales saying that he never wanted to discuss this subject again as long as he was on this board. I just feel like this is beating a dead horse. There doesn't need to be a policy in place "just in case" SMOD is brought up again because I may be seriously mistaken but, I find it highly ironic that after everything concerning SMOD has calmed down and I'm the only person still regularly attending board events, that it's being talked about once more. I feel that the subject needs to be dropped now and forever. I have a great deal of respect for the board and for adults in general, but events like tonight make me very leery of trusting some of the board members. Please e-mail me as soon as possible to clear the air. What are your intentions/reasons for bringing this up once again? What else is there to discuss if the board has agreed to not have uniforms--ever? Thanks for your time!

Thanks,
Brittany Gibson

And here is the e-mail that Ron Price sent to Brittany Gibson in response...

Dear Ms. Gibson,

Thank you for writing your questions about SMOD at the October 8 board meeting. After reading your message I understand why you have a few questions. I think these questions are due to your misunderstanding about the vote on SMOD. The vote was to rescind the vote to implement SMOD. As far as SMOD being permanently voted out that is not legal under the constitutional. We cannot foretell the future and cannot know if this issue will ever be brought up again. If it is the school district needs to have guidelines in place for those considering such a question.

It is a testament to our democratic system of governance that issues can be brought up more than once. Such is the freedom of speech and a basic right guaranteed under the Constitution, we must allow both those whom we agree with and those we do not, to have an equal opportunity to speak freely.

I will be sure to keep your views in mind should the Board of Education consider SMOD in the future.

Sincerely,

Ron Price

Has there ever been an elected official in Rockingham County history who shows this much condescension toward his constituents than does Ron Price?

"I think these questions are due to your misunderstanding about the vote on SMOD." What's to misunderstand, Price? The initial vote was based on very erroneous and some have even said fraudulent data... and you showed everyone how much you thought about them when you continued to champion SMOD in spite of knowing that.

"As far as SMOD being permanently voted out that is not legal under the constitutional." Here Price is making a thinly-veiled show of his sense of power. It's very much in keeping with the mindset he has displayed for almost a year now: that he believes that because "I was elected" (his exact words to one person), that this is some kind of divine anointment that he can do... pretty much anything he damned well pleases.

"We cannot foretell the future and cannot know if this issue will ever be brought up again." In other words: Ron Price has every intention to bring it up again. He's just trying to put his ducks in a row so that he won't take flack for when it does come up again (at his urging no doubt).

"If it is the school district needs to have guidelines in place for those considering such a question." No, the school district doesn't need these guidelines. Price just "needs" to look like a big-shot and this is a chance for him to throw his weight around.

I learned a long time ago that one of the most worthless things on Earth is a bureaucrat who has nothing better to do than to "look important". In that regard, Ron Price is not only the worst member of the Rockingham County Board of Education, but the most worthless, too.

And then there's this lil' line: "It is a testament to our democratic system of governance that issues can be brought up more than once. Such is the freedom of speech and a basic right guaranteed under the Constitution, we must allow both those whom we agree with and those we do not, to have an equal opportunity to speak freely."

Who the hell does Ron Price think he is, that he can lecture anyone about the Constitution? The Constitution is about the rule of law and Ron Price has demonstrated that he believes in anything but that. In his mind, right and wrong are a matter of personal perspective: it doesn't really matter to Price that he stole things that did not belong to him. It only matters that he was able to skirt around the law and get away with it. To Ron Price, the Constitution is something that he can freely interpret at his choosing to the detriment of anything... or anyone... else.

I hope this is all taken to heart by the parents and students of Rockingham County: what Reidsville Middle and Reidsville High families just went through, you're probably going to have to be preparing to fight SMOD too, 'cuz Ron Price already seems bound and determined to bring it back one way or another.

To the members of the Rockingham County Board of Education who I know and respect, and who I believe read this blog on a routine basis: there's a mad dog in your midst that needs to be effectively neutered before he does some damage. He doesn't care about what he does to other people. His only concern is for himself. This is the worst possible kind of "public servant" and you would do well to minimize the destruction that he can do not only to we in the public, but to you as well.

Thanks to Brittany Gibson for letting me post this here.

As for SMOD well, I'll repeat what I cried out last week...

"There is one SMOD, and Ron Price is its prophet!

POTSMOD ACKBAR!!!"

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NOT AGAIN! School uniforms come up at tonight's Board of Education meeting (and I try to get tasered!)

After everything that happened at the July meeting, you would think that Standard Mode Of Dress ("SMOD") aka school uniforms would not come up again anytime soon at the Rockingham County Board of Education. Or ever again for that matter.

Well, tonight it did.

Take a wild guess who brought it up.

Now to be fair, Ron Price did not outright suggest putting the SMOD issue back up for discussion as something to be immediately implemented (all hell would have broken loose on the far opposite side of the table if he had tried to). But the mere fact that Price spoke at length about wanting to have policies and guidelines already in place and ready for SMOD "in case" it is ever implemented, is troubling enough. I also happened to notice that Price spoke about SMOD as if it was something that the administrators and faculties of schools should decide upon, without any reference at all to soliciting input from the parents as to whether or not they and their children want uniforms.

Someone else told me during the meeting that it sure sounded like Price is trying to impose SMOD somewhere, that he's laying the groundwork down for it at least.

Talk about beating a dead horse!

In other Board of Education items, Gene Saunders - the drama teacher at Rockingham County Senior High and a longtime leader in area theatre - addressed the board about a new drama guild for high school students throughout the county that is now forming up. Saunders said that the plan right now is to have everything ready so that this summer the guild's first production will be Disney's High School Musical, which would no doubt be a big hit with the kids. The issue of where the wrestling team at Rockingham County Senior High also came up, 'cuz there's not any real room for them to practice on their own and it's a hassle - and a lot of wear and tear - to keep unrolling out the mats every afternoon. The biggest concern is not just room but having it stay warm over the winter without incurring too big a heating cost.

Oh yeah, and I tried my darndest to get tasered tonight! Superintendent Dr. Rodney Shotwell brought up the issue of tasers in high school and Rockingham County Sheriff's Deputy Clarence Cheshire gave a great impromptu discussion of tasers, how they work etc. I think it was board member Steve Smith who jovially asked for a demonstration and while everyone was laughing I spoke out "Hey Steve, I'll do it!" Steve told everyone "Hey we've got a volunteer!" and I think it must have horrified some folks especially board chair Elaine McCollum 'cuz she knows that I'd have done it, too! Unfortunately because of legal liabilities etc. Deputy Cheshire wasn't allowed to use the taser on me as a demonstration. But hey, I was willing to do it! I was hoping that Cheshire - who's a really good fella - would zap me so that I could start screaming "DON'T TASER ME BRO!" Woulda made for a great write-up in tomorrow's Reidsville Review :-P

All things considered, it was one of the quieter Bored meetings that I've been too.

But let the word go out to my brothers and sisters in the cause: beware and be aware, that we may have to fight this all over again...

"There is one SMOD, and Ron Price is its prophet!

P.O.T.S.M.O.D. ACKBAR!!!"

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MAN ON FIRE: What ALMOST happened to protest uniforms at Reidsville schools

This morning I was going back though the past few months of blog posts looking for something I'd written pertaining to education. In the course of searching I found the video of WGSR's Star Talk on June 14th where Mark Childrey interviewed me about my plans to address the July 9th meeting of the Rockingham County Board of Education while dressed as a Jedi Knight. It was all to protest the "Standard Mode of Dress" (legalese for "school uniforms") at Reidsville Middle and Reidsville High schools that the board had approved.

As was reported here a few weeks later, the board wound up rescinding the earlier vote to implement the policy after POTSMOD (People Opposed To Standard Mode Of Dress) turned the meeting into a media spectacle with picketing by students, black armbands and not just a Jedi but an "escaped convict" too :-)

Well, I watched the video again and it got to the part where I was alluded to Mark that I had "something much more outrageous" in mind if the board continued to refuse to acknowledge us. What this was, I told Mark, would "drop jaws all over the place".

Fortunately, the board did hear us out. And we are thankful that they did and that they overturned their initial vote for the uniforms.

But I was not bluffing. There was something that I had planned to do if the board, at the July meeting, continued to deny our protests.

If the Jedi Costume didn't grab their attention, I was seriously intending to escalate this thing, big time.

The only people who've known about this before now were my wife Lisa, Samantha Fettig of POTSMOD, Richard Moore, "Weird" Ed Woody, and just a few others. They were all sworn to secrecy about it. They also, every single one of them, tried their darndest to talk me out of doing this.

But after studying it long and hard and figuring that (a) if it was in the public interest to do this then I'd have no problem with attempting it and (b) it would be an awesome experience if I survived, I was all the more bound and determined to be ready to do this.

So what was it?

If, after the July 9th meeting, we could not help but believe that the Rockingham County Board of Education was not interested in our concerns about the school uniforms and why we did not want them, then I was going to pick a date and send out a whole wazoo-load of press releases, telling every TV and radio station, newspaper, blogger and whoever else came to mind to be at a certain spot at a certain time.

When the press was all situated, I was going to come out wearing one of those flame-proof suits that cover you from head to toe, set myself on fire, and with the cameras rolling stand there with a sign saying "SCHOOL UNIFORMS BURN ME UP!"

The effect was hopefully going to be like what you see in the photo on the right.

The plan was for me to stand there for several seconds all lit up holding the sign, long enough for everyone to get good footage and pics, and then have volunteers with fire extinguishers douse out the flames.

So intent on going through with this was I, that the announcement of my plan for it was written into the first draft of my speech before the board. Luckily a cooler head (bad pun I know) prevailed and the "threat" didn't make it into the second version of the remarks. But I can only imagine what the look of horror on the faces of all those board members might have been, had I gone through with publicizing it that night...

...and especially what the reactions from a certain few of the members would have been. You see, they're the ones who know me. We've been friends for many, many years. And they would be the first to tell you that they KNOW that I am outrageous enough to try something like this! Emphasis on "try": they're well aware that I would take a stab at it even if success wasn't guaranteed. If the stunt might be glorious and spectacular, that's all I need to know to want to attempt it. Although so far as physical danger goes, this would have been one of the more daring things that I'd have ever considered.

Would I have really done this? For my brothers and sisters in POTSMOD and for the kids at Reidsville Middle and Reidsville High schools, you bet that I would have.

Thankfully (and I really can't stress that nearly enough), things didn't get to that point at all. The board voted 7-3 at the July meeting to overturn the uniforms policy at the two schools. So ever since classes started a few weeks ago the middle and high school students in Reidsville get to wear whatever they want, so long as it adheres to the reasonable dress code.

But for a few weeks there, in the summer of 2007, Rockingham County was almost the site of its very own version of the Burning Man tour.

Look, it could have been worse. At least I didn't have The Wicker Man in mind when I hatched this crazy plot...

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