The teddy bear that my sister Anita placed inside Mom's casket on the morning of the funeral. I enclosed a letter: the last piece of writing that I ever did for my mother.
The casket at the graveside, immediately following the service...
The final resting place of Mom's earthly body, after the grave had been filled...
I am still recovering from it, although I'm sincerely shocked at how well I've been able to maintain myself through it all. Have there been tears? Absolutely. But... my girlfriend keeps telling me that I'm stronger than I was a year or so ago, when this would have completely devastated me. Probably to the point of needing severe medication. But this past week has seen me the furthest thing from that. Maybe the most composed in the face of tragedy that I've ever been. And I really don't know how that could come to be, except by the grace of God.
I am going to be writing a more fitting memorial to Mom on this blog in the next few days, as my thoughts are able to more clearly coalesce. But until then, thought I'd share this with all two of The Knight Shift's faithful readers. Wilkerson Funeral Service was extremely helpful to our family in this time of need, going above and beyond the call of a mortuary firm. But then, it's Wilkerson: I would have expected no less from such a fine, established company. I wish we could have had time to find more photos, but they did a terrific job in assembling the following video which played in the chapel during visitation. I just uploaded it to YouTube a short while ago, mostly so that family who couldn't make it to the funeral can get to view it. Thought I'd share it with this blog's readership as well...
Thank you to everyone who has been keeping our family in thoughts and prayers.
I'm going to be away for awhile. Will try to return to this blog sometime soon.
EDIT 1:21 a.m. 12/29/2011: This has been the longest day that I can remember, from Tuesday evening on through the phone call early yesterday morning asking me to return to the hospice and then, less than an hour and a half later, Mom's passing. Between then and now have been our family making arrangements at the funeral home, a stream of visitors to our home, and many many phone calls and text messages (my sister Anita swears that her iPhone is going to explode from all the traffic!).
Some will no doubt be wondering how I'm doing in light of my disclosure on this blog that I have bipolar disorder. To be honest: better than I thought I would be. But I couldn't have gone through this were I still the person that I was a year ago. What happened that made the difference? I can only say this: in our tribulations, God makes us stronger. This morning Dad and I held Mom's hands as she passed away, not letting go for some time after the nurse called the time and told us that Mom had gone. And, well... I just can't imagine being able to do that before.
I'm only taking my regular medication for bipolar right now. There are some stronger meds available within my grasp, but I didn't want to go on them. Not for this. Just, had to be there, all there, for her. For my family. I'll write more about that later though.
But if I'm strong at all through this, it's only because God does grant peace. It is to Him that I cling right now. Just as I cling to the promise that this is not the end. That I will see Mom again someday.
As soon as I came back home from the hospice I began to write Mom's obituary. It was something I told Dad the morning before that I wanted to do, for her. Didn't have much time to compose it before it was due, and it came during the most exhaustive stretch that I've yet experienced (have had not more than 10 hours of solid sleep during the past two weeks).
Here it is.
Ruby Roberts KnightThere will be more but for now, I need to take care of my family. Expect some new blogging after we have finished doing what we need to do. And again, for all who have sent condolences, on behalf of Dad and Anita and the rest of our family, I thank you.REIDSVILLE — At 8:26 on the morning of December 28 2011, surrounded by family and with her husband and son holding her hands, Ruby Roberts Knight was let slip from the circles of this broken world, away at last from her pain and suffering and into the comforting presence of her Lord.Funeral services will be held 3 p.m. Friday, December 30, 2011 at Midway United Methodist Church with Rev. Larry Scott, Rev. George Roberson and Rev. Sandy Brown. The burial will follow in the church cemetery. Pallbearers at her funeral: Craig Roberts of Clemmons, Kenneth Roberts of Reidsville, Jesse Roberts of Reidsville, Frankie Stiers of Palm Bay, Florida, Walter Joyce of Reidsville, and Chad Austin of Raleigh. Honorary pallbearers: Richard Wright of Reidsville, John Ashe of Reidsville, Lee Patterson of Reidsville, and Ed Woody of Waynesville.
Born on December 3, 1937, Ruby was the daughter of Elsie Wimbush Roberts and James "Duck" Roberts. In addition to her parents, Ruby grew up in a rambunctious household with six brothers and one sister. From her family she learned the value of love, of laughter, of devotion to those cared for and of faithfulness to God. She was a woman of great generosity, of formidable temerity when roiled to stand for good cause, and always a figure of inspiring courage. Ruby did not complete high school but was later proud of achieving her G.E.D. In 1970 she married and in the years following gave birth to two children: each of whom she encouraged to pursue education and to never stop learning. In 1977 Ruby was one of the first to be employed at the new Miller Brewery in Eden: she worked as a labeler operator until her retirement in 2001. In her spare time Ruby enjoyed traveling, hosting visitors (many of which over the years came to her house from distant countries), sewing, sharpening her keen mind with crossword puzzles, and especially cooking: a skill that she inherited from her mother. She was a member of Midway United Methodist Church and maintained strong ties with Evangelical Methodist Church, both in Reidsville. She was preceded in death by her mother, her father, her brother Franklin Stiers, her brother Michael Stiers, her brother Wayne Roberts, and many others who had gone on before into the presence of the Lord.
She is survived by husband of 41 years Robert Rankin Knight of the home, son Robert Christopher Knight of the home, and daughter Anita Christine Knight of Dunn, North Carolina. She is also survived by sister Glendora Roberts, brother Kenneth "Nub" Roberts, brother R.A. "Snooks" Roberts, and brother Jesse James Roberts, all of Reidsville. Ruby is also survived by a very special friend of the immediate family, Kristen Lee Bradford of Roanoke, Virginia. She is also survived by many, many nephews and nieces, several cousins, and a lifetime's worth of friends and co-workers, many of whom lovingly referred to her with the childhood nickname that she carried throughout her life: "Sister".
The family will receive friends Thursday, December 29 at Wilkerson Funeral Home from 7 to 9 p.m. and other times at the residence.
In lieu of flowers, the family requests that donations be made to Hospice of Rockingham County, PO Box 281, Wentworth, North Carolina 27375.
Condolences may be sent to the family at www.wilkersonfuneral.com
Published in News Record on December 29, 2011
