Turkey frying: I just can't even... (Thanksgiving 2024 mishaps)

Longtime readers of this blog know well my fondness for deep-fried turkey.  It's an art that I've been doing since Thanksgiving 2002 and I take it very seriously.  For me there is no finer way to cook a bird as magnificent as the American turkey than to fry it in a cauldron of hot peanut or cottonseed oil (your preference) for forty minutes or so.  It makes the meat VERY juicy and tender.  And there's the machismo thing going there: Turkey frying really is quite a manly task to perform.  It's so potentially dangerous.  Precautions must absolutely be taken to ensure safety for all involved.  I'm as professional as one is apt to be without doing this for a full-time living but keeping everyone safe is something I don't mess around with.  Unfortunately there are always the troublemakers that turn up every Thanksgiving who have to show us now NOT to deep fry turkey.  And here are two examples from this year's holiday that have me shaking my head in disbelief.

First up is this story out of Connecticut where some people attempted to fry a turkey inside the garage of their $4 million mansion.  Here is the result:

The people survived but the mansion was reduced to a smoldering ruin.  To quote Beavis and Butthead: "Huh-huh-huh, dumb-asses!"

This next one, has me really scratching my head.  In video he posted to his social media accounts, none other than incoming Health and Human Services secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr.  is deep frying a turkey of his own.  Can you spot what he's doing wrong?

Let's see... for one thing he has no shoes on!  He's also frying in a short-sleeved shirt.  And he is not wearing gloves!  Any one of those is a major no-no.  Especially operating a fryer in bare feet.  WHAT is he thinking?!?

Without seeing the burner itself it looks like RFK Jr. might be using a tripod-based fryer... which is something I for one would NEVER use.  I've owned two fryers in my time and they've each have a wide square base.  Much more stability with that.  A three-legged fryer is too top-heavy and at risk of tipping over.

I would also recommend wearing eye protection.  I've worn sunglasses (if I have any) most of the times I've fried.  I've never seen hot oil pop anywhere that high up, but you just never know.

I wish that I could report that I've had fried turkey this Thanksgiving.  Unfortunately I haven't been able to make any since Christmas 2019, before the COVID plague cranked up.  And the price of both peanut and cottonseed oil has more than doubled: One of the more expensive things that has come to cost more in the Biden-era economy.  Maybe things are going to get better now.  Make America Fry Again, President Trump!  Anyhoo if you want to see what it's looked like when I'm at work here are some pics that my girlfriend at the time took during Thanksgiving in 2012.

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Turkey Frying... IN COLOR!

Kristen's brother Scott Bradford was a witness to the turkey deep-frying on Thanksgiving two days ago. While maintaining a safe distance (and maybe more than that) he shot some terrific video of the action. Scott edited it together and now for your viewing pleasure y'all can watch the searing heat and tormentuous oil in all its glory!!

Scott also posted the video on his own blog, and he testifies to the exquisite and juicy taste that in a turkey can only be achieved by frying it.

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Deep-fried turkey, Thanksgiving 2012 Edition

Another Thanksgiving has come... and with it, once again, another round of Yours Truly doin' up some deep-fried turkey!

This year's Thanksgiving was special, in a number of ways. For one, I'm spending it with Kristen and her family. For another, this marks my tenth anniversary of deep-frying turkey! So for those reasons and more, I wanted this one to be extra special.

Here's the turkey chosen to be sacrificed to the flames and the oil. I found one weighing-in at just under 15 pounds: the perfect mass to feed a gang of six! What you see here is the turkey on the spit ready to be fried, after spending thirty-three hours of being marinaded and rubbed down with Cajun seasoning.

In this next photo the oil is almost hot enough to lower the turkey in. The cooking temperature is 350 Fahrenheit. I heat it up to 375 though to begin with, because the temperature is going to drop precipitously when the turkey goes in. Of course, the bird has been patted down good and dry on the outside to keep nasty hot oil from spattering out. Looking at the pot with much interest and anticipation is Kristen's father...

Here we go, (not so) fast and (plenty) furious!! Kristen's brother Scott is shown taking photos, albeit from a considerably safe distance...

Awright, this next picture requires some explanation. The oil was in the pot and I had just turned on the burner when I realized to much horror... my thermometer was broken!!! The trusty instrument that had seen ten years and many, many fried turkeys had died. And at the WORST possible moment too!
No time to panic though. Not as one working with hazardous materials. Certainly not as an Eagle Scout. Kristen's mom and brother made a quick jaunt to Wal-Mart and found two thermometers, neither one of them built with deep-frying safety in mind but hey, ya gotta takes what ya can.

So here is me in what Kristen calls the "fisherman pose": lowering a candy thermometer into the oil with a wire coat hanger!

But, the new thermometer came through with flying colors. And 45 minutes later...

...the culinary masterpiece was ready to be admired for its beauty and its juicy, delicious flavor!

I'm always looking for new ways to improve my turkey-frying technique. There were a couple of tricks that I employed this time for both product quality and personal safety. With the exception of the thermometer emergency, the entire process was by far the smoothest and cleanest that I've ever had.

'Twas a most excellent Thanksgiving dinner! The turkey came out great, and there was the terrific desserts made by Kristen's mom and sister-in-law (Melissa makes the most potent chocolate cupcakes in the history of anything).

And now, I get to enjoy a few weeks' respite before doing this all over again for Christmas. For which I've already been threatened with getting chained to the burner until I make enough fried turkey for everyone who's been demanding it this past year :-P

Update 7:19 pm EST: D'oh!! I forgot to document the music that I chose to fry too! That's also an important part of the ritual.There were a number of albums which came to mind. I think up to a few weeks ago the obvious choice would have been the Game of Thrones Season 1 soundtrack. But then there came the big news of October 30th...

So in celebration of the imminent return we shall be making to that galaxy far, far away, I had Disc 2 of The Empire Strikes Back: Special Edtion playing from my iPod. Not just John Williams' finest composition for a Star Wars movie, but in my opinion the definitive Star Wars orchestral score album!

It was released in February of 1997. And in spite of being the most vintage album to be used during my rituals, it was spot-on perfect for the task. And just after telling friends that this would be the music of the hour, the news broke that Lawrence Kasdan will be returning to the gang and he's writing Episodes VIII and IX! Truly a good omen :-)

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Look! VIDEO of me frying those Thanksgiving turkeys!

When I first posted about this Thanksgiving's deep-fried turkey earlier this evening, I forgot to mention that for this past holiday's music to fry to, I chose to use Steve Jablonsky's soundtrack for Gears of War 3. Should have made a note of that earlier 'cuz hey, that kind of thing is important to my personal ritual of deep-frying turkey. Kristen and my friends that I was frying for all thought that it was a terrific score and perfect for the occasion :-)

Well, a short while ago Kristen surprised me with this video that she put together of me preparing the turkey in the kitchen and then putting it into the oil... which turned out to be the most dangerous bird that I have yet to fry!! No seriously: a tiny bit of hot oil jumped up and hit me in the face. It startled me for a second or two but there was no burn (thankfully!). Still, it was a sobering reminder that this is dangerous and it takes considerable forethought and a bit of lunacy to attempt :-P

Okay well without further ado, here is my girlfriend Kristen's video that she shot and edited together!

Once again, great job Kristen!! I especially loved the end credits (including that lil' jab at PETA :-)

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Pics of this year's Thanksgiving fried turkey!

As I have done (most) Thanksgivings since 2002, I deep-fried some turkey! Just now getting the pics up 'cuz my girlfriend Kristen stayed here for the holiday: our first Thanksgiving together! And she was the one taking the pics and I hadda wait until she got back home to pull them to her computer and send them to me. So for those who had wondered if I fried turkey this year: ohhhhh yeah!!

In fact, I fried two birds this Thanksgiving. The first for another family that are good friends of mine, and the second was ours. Kristen was there to photo document most of the entire process.

Here I am with that crazy look that I get whenever my mouth starts salivating for fried turkey. It was probably a good thing that Kristen spent this Thanksgiving with me: she got to see how I really am when it comes to deep-frying turkey. I'd been warning her for months that this was coming, but to see it with her own eyes... well, nothing could have truly prepared her. You know how in the past few movies that he's done, how Daniel Day-Lewis gets that murderous glint in his eye before going psycho on some poor shlub? Well, that's pretty much me at this time of year...

Injecting the bird with garlic butter. I began marinading at 4 a.m. on the day before Thanksgiving, and gave each bird three full treatments of marinade and Cajun seasoning!

More marinading after giving a bird a healthy dose of Cajun seasoning. I pour gobs of the stuff onto the skin and then vigorously rub it in hard and deep...

Thanksgiving morning: pouring the cottonseed oil into the pot, which will soon be heated to 350 degrees Fahrenheit...

CAREFULLY lowering the turkey into the oil...

45 minutes later (cooking at 3 minutes per pound) the turkey is done! :-)

Now all that's left to do is carve into it and eat it! And everyone agree that it was incredibly delicious as always! Kristen said that it was lived up to the hype :-)

Now, only 25 days before I get to do it all over again. The second-most deadly form of cooking known to man (after preparing fugu) and in the tenth year of doing it, I haven't burned the house down. Yet. Let's hope my streak of good luck continues for many more years to come :-P

Thanks to Kristen for taking such great photos!

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Department of Homeland Security issues turkey fryer safety warning

Janet "Big Sister" Napolitano's Department of Homeland Security (okay let's be fair, it was George W. Bush's "brilliant" idea first) has decided that turkey fryers are a dire threat to national security. "Make sure the turkey is completely thawed before placing in a fryer", the DHS is warning in a new video.

Hey, Janet Napolitano: I'm a hella lot safer with my turkey deep-fryer than anyone is with your X-ray body scanners! You know: the X-ran body scanners that YOU REFUSE TO PUT YOURSELF THROUGH.

Who do these people think they are?

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William Shatner and State Farm make weird Thanksgiving safety video

One week from today I'm gonna be up to my elbows in marinade, Cajun seasoning and all kinds of other good stuff as I prepare three... count 'em, three... turkeys for a hot fryin' bath in cottonseed oil. Yes it's that time of the year again, when Yours Truly goes bonkers for the deep-fried turkey! As has been done in years before, expect photos chronicling the art, and perhaps even a video or two.

However I cannot emphasize it nearly enough: deep-frying turkey is potentially a very dangerous activity. I haven't been burned (yet) but there have been a few close calls, despite taking every precaution that I know of. To me it's worth the risk because deep-frying honestly does produce the most tender and succulent meat that you'll ever get from any method of cooking a turkey, and I suppose that there's always going to be a possibility of injury with any activity involving a heat source. Unfortunately the vast majority of turkey frying disasters happen because those doing the cooking overlook some ridiculously simple and even common sense issues pertaining to the peculiarities of deep-frying.

And speaking of things "peculiar", State Farm Insurance has produced this wacky and fun public service announcement starring the one and only William Shatner! So without further ado, here is The Shatner in "Eat, Fry, Love"...

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Did I deep-fry some turkey for Christmas?

Ohhhh yeah, I deep-fried the turkey! Three of them, in fact! All on Christmas Eve. Two 12-pound full-sized birds for friends and a turkey breast for my own family gathering.

Here's the first bird that I did...

The second turkey...

And the turkey breast: smaller but no less succulent!

And hey, look who showed up! None other than Tebow Wasmund, the popular pup (who was recently seen as Sandy the dog in a production of Annie) and his mistress Peggy! Tebow is well known around here as he is often courting admirers at iCoffee in nearby Summerfield. It's a great lil' coffee house and well worth visiting!

I guess you just can't keep a good dog away from the scent of fried turkey :-P

And 'twas a good thing that I got all that frying done on Christmas Eve 'cuz the next day, we got our first real White Christmas in almost fifty years...

In case anyone is wondering, I used Lost: The Final Season as the soundtrack to which I fried this batch of turkeys to.

Incidentally, I have come up with a pretty... shall we say, "interesting?"... idea for a new turkey fryer. And there is already someone that I am conspiring with to make it into a reality. Guess that'll be a project to work on for 2011. Expect pictures and YouTube video if/when we pull it off.

And, that wraps up turkey frying for the 2010 holiday season! So help me, my hands will be smelling like garlic butter for a whole 'nother month.

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"No matter where you go, there you are."

Awright, first person who can tell me what obscure mondo-bizarro film that is from, can buy themselves a candy bar and pretend I got it for them.

I'm... not quite ready to return to this blog at the usual frenetic frequency that all two of my loyal readers have come to appreciate. According to my figures there had been an average of five new posts a day for quite some time now. But if you look at the front page that I'm seeing right now, there've only been twenty-five posts since mid-August!

Clearly, something has been amiss with Your Friend and Humble Narrator.

I'm not retiring The Knight Shift (well, not planning to anyway: some claim that this blog has caused more mischief than WikiLeaks... and look at where that site has gone lately!). But there is certainly - and there has already been - some significant "shifting around" of sorts behind the scenes as I have had to wrestle with quite a bit in my personal life. And I may or may not have divulged more than enough of that already.

What can I say? I believe in being honest and sincere. And most especially to and about myself. As the Bard wrote in Hamlet, "To thine own self be true".

I believe that. Even when my own self is wracked with common human foibles and frailties and a few more common than we often care to admit.

This blog has always been about things that interest me, that I believe others might find interesting as well, and as a place where I can share my thoughts and reflections on various matters. This site in its seven years of operation has done quite a lot: from movie reviews, to chronicling my running for public office, to premiering movies that I have made with friends, to documenting the exploits of the last great American moonshiner, to taking on a multimedia giant in a copyright dispute (and prevailing in the end), to recipes, and well... just about anything and everything in between.

And now, there is something else that I'll be writing about and reflecting upon. Not a new thing, but something that I'm inclined to believe is important enough to share some perspective about. And maybe others will come away from this blog even a bit wiser and more enlightened for the time spend reading from it. In the end, that is all any writer is really hoping to accomplish.

So that is what I'll be doing. Along with everything else that readers have come to expect from this blog. And Lord willing, I'll be doing more of that sooner than later.

In the meantime, to The Knight Shift's regular and faithful readership: Hello again! And to those who will be coming across this blog during the next few days: Welcome! Hope you like what you find here :-)

By the way, in case any of the regular readership is wondering if I deep-fried any turkey this past Thanksgiving...

Ahhh c'mon: y'all didn't think that I wouldn't properly document something like that, didja?!

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How'd them fried turkeys come out? Behold the pics and video!

Last year it was the outrageously jacked-up price of peanut oil that kept fried turkey from being economically feasible.  This year I thought the price had gone down when I went to buy it, but turns out I was using cottonseed oil instead!  Which turned out to be a pleasant surprise.  I'd been wanting to try cottonseed oil for awhile now but couldn't find it anywhere.  Same great taste when all was done though!

Here's the first bird that I did (for a customer), after about 30 hours of marinading and rubbing-in seasoning, as it awaits the 350 degree Fahrenheit hot oil...

Yours Truly carefully lowering the turkey in...

Frying at 3 and a half minutes per pound, this 9-pounder took 35 minutes to cook...

A little over half an hour later (a heckuva lot shorter time than basting it in an oven) this turkey is done!

Beautiful, ain't it? :-)

Now this next one is the turkey that I fried for my own family's Thanksgiving dinner. And lemme tell ya: I've never done one this big before. It weighed in at more than TWENTY AND A HALF POUNDS! I nicknamed it "The Beast", it was so monstrously large. Think the previous biggest one was about 13 pounds and I darn nearly had cardiac infarction when Dad told me how big a bird he had purchased. But, I'm always up for a challenge.

Here's "The Beast" before frying...

A turkey this big deserves something better than just still pics, don't ya think? So how about a video clip of me lowering it into the oil...

"The Beast" took 75 minutes to thoroughly fry...

And an hour and fifteen minutes later...

That is going to be my personal standard by which all future fried turkeys will be judged. If all the rest to come can be as big and juicy and delicious as The Beast, I will be happy :-)

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Thanksgiving 2009: And so it begins...

The twenty-pound turkey (what the heck was Dad thinking?!?) that will be our own family's main course tomorrow. Since this is the biggest bird of the batch, I used this one to do the "water trick" with to measure out how much peanut oil to pour into the pot tomorrow morning. That means you put the turkey in, and start pouring cold water into the pot until it meets the top of the turkey. Then take it out and make a mark (I use a piece of tape) at the water line minus the displacement. That way you don't have to rough guess and risk flames and destruction when peanut oil comes flowing over the top of the pot...

So all the birds are now marinaded and well-rubbed in with Cajun seasoning. There'll be several more treatments throughout the day but for now "the chef" is going to take a break and do something I've hardly had time to do at all the past few months: finally get into seriously playing Batman: Arkham Asylum :-)

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Chris Knight's somewhat typical Sunday

Right now: catching up on e-mail and news.

Later: writing more of the novel that I've been working on for National Novel Writing Month, which as things stand now won't be finished by the end of November because of all the good stuff that I'm finding to add into it. But what will be done by then should still be enough to meet the 150-pages needed to qualify as "done" for the month. I'll just put the finishing touches on it later :-)

Later still: painting some more of my army of Orks for Warhammer 40,000 and then laying out all my works for turkey frying on Thursday.

And done already this morning: videography of the baptisms of a friend's children at a church in Greensboro. I'd never done a baptismal job before.

Maybe someday I'll get to film a bris. But please... no tipping! :-P

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Hey, live near Reidsville, North Carolina? Want a professionally-fried turkey for Thanksgiving? Read on!

Lots of this blog's readers are well aware of my obsession with/addiction to deep-fried turkey. I first heard about it nine years ago this month and then spent two more years studying the technique and getting brave enough to attempt it. With that first succulent bite in 2002, I knew that Thanksgiving would never be the same for me again. I'll never go back to basted turkey if I can help it. For me, a bird as magnificent as a turkey deserves better. Deep-frying it is the only way to honor what no less an authority than Benjamin Franklin once decreed should be our national fowl.

This is not mere "cooking" to me. This is an art! One that demands meticulous care and attention and passion. That this is also considered the second most dangerous form of preparing food known to man (after cleaning fugu) is even more extra incentive to treat turkey frying like delicate surgery. I love my work but I also know how to be really careful. I haven't been burned yet and Lord willing, I won't be anytime soon either.

Well anyway, for some reason my fried turkey has always been a smashing success for Thanksgiving and Christmas and a few other festive occasions. It's always the first thing to go at the family table. And a bunch of folks have told me over the years that I should go public with my nigh-patentable technique. That I could offer my services to others, for a reasonable fee.

I hadn't really given it much thought. But y'all know me: I'll try anything once!

If you live anywhere within driving distance of Reidsville and your mouth is already watering for one of those gloriously seasoned and deep-fried turkeys like you see me holding in that photo, fire me an e-mail at theknightshift@gmail.com and I'll get back in contact with you. Thanksgiving is a little less than two weeks away. I've already got a few orders in and can fit in some more.

And remember: you ain't just buying a turkey. You're buying confidence! Confidence that your Thanksgiving main course will be given all due diligent care, that it'll be done by an experienced pro, and that you will be risking neither your own life or house! That's a no-lose proposition folks :-)

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Recession to rob many of fried turkey this Thanksgiving

See the photo on the right? That's me a few years ago on Thanksgiving, holding a golden brown, succulent deep-fried turkey. It's considered the second most dangerous form of cooking known to man (after preparing fugu) and I've done it plenty of times since 2002. And especially for family and friends, who have always enjoyed the exceptionally juicy meat that comes from preparing the bird this way. It's a taste that I've become rather addicted to. And I was looking forward to doing up one or two or even more next week...

But this will be one Thanksgiving that I'm gonna have to do without my beloved fried turkey. So is everyone else who does this that I've spoken to. I wouldn't mind paying for it but the people around me keep telling me to "save your money".

The reason: the price of peanut oil has gone through the roof.

When I first started doing this, I could buy a three-gallon container of peanut oil for twenty bucks. Last year it was $25. I was in a meat market yesterday afternoon, one of the best places in town, and three gallons of peanut oil this year is a whopping thirty-five dollars.

I always have to buy two containers for my frying needs.

I chatted some with the manager and he said nobody is buying any this year... and usually they've done quite a bit of business selling it already.

"What's your take on why the price has gone up?" I asked.

"Bad biofuel decisions," he replied.

Doesn't surprise me. I've been hearing all year that biofuel subsidies have wrecked havoc with cooking oil across the board. And then you factor in that peanut production is down anyway, and the stuff does become a valuable commodity.

But the manager also told me that it's the economy in general which is the reason why most people are going back to basted this year. There's not as much free money to spend on what by all rights should be a gloriously prepared banquet to share with loved ones.

This was the first sign that really hit me upside the head, that we are in a recession. And there's been a helluva lot worse than "bad decisions" about biofuel going on lately, what with $700 BILLION of taxpayer money that Congress and the Bush White House is doling out with NO oversight. For sure, I don't see the lean times ending anytime soon.

For fiscal irresponsibility leading to desecration of an honored method to treat a bird as noble as the turkey, I've got just one thing to say about the miscreants who've wound up in charge of our money:

Boil 'em in oil!

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Pics and report on Thanksgiving 2007's deep-fried turkey

I awoke at dawn, had breakfast but didn't bother to shower. When you know that you'll be working with searing-hot oil and will get blasted with steam rich in the aroma of garlic butter, getting cleaned-up for Thanksgiving dinner is kind of a moot thing.

Deep-frying a turkey is the only form of cooking that I know of that demands wearing extra layers of clothing and such demanding attention to detail. It's like being a combination firefighter, M*A*S*H surgeon and gourmet chef. This is masculine cooking to the max. In fact, I've only seen one woman deep-fry a turkey: the indomitable Paula Dean. But then, Paula Dean can do anything in the kitchen. That she is the only woman I have witnessed frying a turkey makes her all the more magnificent. Behold her awesome culinary skills and tremble, mere mortals!

Anyhoo, we had breakfast - just a little bacon and toast 'cuz I didn't want to eat too much and feel slowed-down by digestion. I decided to start the operation a little earlier than usual because the forecast called for increased winds and dropping temperatures later in the day.

Here's the turkey, after more than a day of preparation with lots of garlic butter marinade and Cajun rub...

Here's the setup for today's frying. When this photo was taken the peanut oil was already about 100 degrees Fahrenheit and steadily rising. That's Lisa's dad sitting in the background, oggling the flames and glory...

Closeup of the peanut oil as it was heating up...

Every time I figure out how long to deep-fry a turkey, I'm reminded of the official U.S. Army manual Procedure for Military Executions, which is the how-to guide that was used to dispatch the Nuremberg war criminals (among others). Just like the Army personnel had to figure in the weight and height of each condemned man so that they'd know how much rope to use on the gallows, so too do you have to take the bird's weight and then determine how long to cook it. It's a fairly delicate dance: the turkey must be fried at 350 degrees, but you want to heat the oil up slightly more than that (say, an extra 10-20 degrees) because the oil temperature is going to drop once the bird is fully submerged. Then figure that for each pound of the turkey that it must be fried for 3.5 minutes. Then tack on an extra 2-5 minutes just to be sure that it's thoroughly cooked. In the case of this turkey, I figured that 40 minutes exactly would be sufficient.

So here it went into the pot...

Lisa's dad took this shot of me still lowering it in. If you want to be safe (which you should) it ought to take you at least 30 seconds, maybe even a full minute to completely put the turkey in. Also make sure that the inside and outside of the bird is as dry as possible...

Putting the turkey in is the most absolutely scary point of the whole operation. When it's safely in, and you have unhooked the spit and can let the hot oil run its course... only then can you really relax (but not too much). But every time that it's finally in the pot, it's a moment of triumph and I couldn't help but let out a big huge rebel yell of "Yeee-haw!!!"

And there's the mad fryer himself!

Like a scene from Dante's Inferno. Ladies and gentlemen, behold the mouth of Hell...

After it was in the pot and I felt comfortable enough about it, I walked a short distance to my car (the one that we've rented 'cuz I'm still without one of my own after the Corolla got totaled) and started Transformers: The Score going almost full-blast out of the speakers. Because part of my turkey-frying tradition is to have good music for the event.

Finally, 40 minutes later, at 11:30 a.m. exactly and just as "Arrival to Earth" was reaching its crescendo, it was time to remove the turkey. Here now, be awed at how beautiful it turned out!

And here it is a short while later when we started serving it for dinner and had begun to carve it. Notice how well cooked it is... and after only 40 minutes of frying time! It also came out very moist and tender, not like traditional basting at all.

Along with the deep-fried turkey we had corn, snap beans, hash-brown casserole and biscuits. It was quite a good meal, and everyone said that they enjoyed the turkey. I certainly did, since it had been almost two years since I had tasted any!

And that was Thanksgiving Dinner 2007 for us. And there's plenty of turkey still left over and I'll no doubt be bloated to the max by the time this weekend is over :-)

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Thanksgiving 2007: Gonna fry now

So it's now early Thanksgiving morning and in case anyone is wondering: yes, this year I am deep-frying a turkey! It'll be the first I've done in two years. I didn't fry one for Thanksgiving last year because I had to work all day at the TV station. Here's a pic of the 2005 Thanksgiving fried turkey and the one I did the previous Christmas and Thanksgiving 2004. You've no idea how much I missed doing one and how much I've been looking forward to this Thanksgiving. I started prepping the bird yesterday and just gave it a checkup and even pre-cooked, it smells delightful!

It must be borne in mind however that deep-frying (or Cajun-frying) a turkey is an EXTREMELY dangerous procedure! Every year, there are dozens (hundreds?) of accidents involving turkey frying that result in damaged homes, some even thoroughly destroyed and worse: severe injury including second and third-degree burns. I don't want to discourage anyone from trying fried turkey (in my opinion the only way to cook so noble a bird) but you really must be exceedingly cautious and maybe even a little crazy if you want to even begin contemplating doing such a thing.

So if you ever decide that you can't resist "going in deep", remember: do the "water trick" before preparing the bird so that you'll know how much oil to use (because the vast majority of turkey-frying accidents stem from putting way too much oil in the pot), don't use a bird that's too big for your pot, wear plenty of protection (especially hands and face), make sure the bird is completely dry on both the outside and inside, never leave the fryer unattended, never do this alone, keep children and animals a safe distance away, do not operate while intoxicated (a good rule for anything), move all vehicles a safe distance away, do not operate the fryer indoors or under a shelter (you wouldn't believe the stories I've heard of people attempting this in their living rooms and I've never heard of it turning out in any way other than the whole house burning down), and perhaps most important of all be patient and do not try to rush things. Cooking at only 3 1/2 - 4 minutes per pound at 350 degrees, it will be ready to eat very soon anyway (this is one of the reasons why I prefer deep-fried turkey, compared to basting which is too slow and leaves the meat too dry for my tastes: Cajun-fried turkey is exceptionally moist and tender).

In addition to all of these rules, I would also say that as a personal preference, I do not use the tripod-stand fryers. My turkeys have always been fried on a four-legged fryer because this maximizes stability for the pot (i.e. far less likely to tip over). It may cost a little extra but the added safety and peace of mind are well worth it.

So with all that said, here are the pre-game stats for Chris Knight's Thanksgiving Deep-Fried Turkey 2007:

Bird: Butterball(tm) brand 11.5 pound turkey (one of these days I'm going to find and prepare a wild turkey)

Marinade: Cajun Injector(tm) Creole Butter

Rub: Cajun Injector(tm) Cajun Shake, used generously on the inside and outside of the bird

Type of oil to be used: Peanut (would like to try cottonseed oil sometime if I can ever find any)

Music: A very important part of my personal turkey-frying ritual is to have a CD playing to mark the occasion, and for entertainment while the bird is cooking. The last time I did this for Thanksgiving, in 2005, it was the soundtrack for Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith, which given all the seared flesh that I was working with seemed quite appropriate :-) This year, for reasons which should be obvious for anyone who's followed this blog over the past few months, the turkey-frying music will be Transformers: The Score by Steve Jablonsky.

After dinner today I'll post some pics of the turkey and show y'all how it turned out (and maybe even some of it frying :-)

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THE DEADLY ART OF DEEP-FRIED TURKEY

While going through some older videotapes I found this, made during the first Christmas that Lisa and I were married. This was at her parents' place in Calhoun, Georgia and is a chronicle of the third turkey that I'd ever fried. Since then I've done many more (and have become much better at it, I think). Lisa was running the camera and the guy you see sitting in the chair with the University of Georgia cap is her dad:

I might make another video about turkey-frying as we get closer to Thanksgiving, this one doing a step-by-step from marinading the bird, to actually frying it. But this one gives a pretty good idea about the process and the extreme danger involved :-)

EDIT 11-18-2007 10:25 a.m. EST: I've decided to stop publicly showing this video, because I'm taking a lot of heat for how "burnt" the turkey looks. And in all honesty... yeah it could look better for the camera. Trust me though: this was much better than how it appears here! I'm going to be frying another one this week, and film it with a new high-definition camcorder, so hopefully it will be a much better show :-)

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