Mormon bishop with Samurai sword rescues woman from stalker, takes punk's ChapStick for DNA and screams "YOU ARE SO DONE!"

Read.  Just read.  From the Associated Press courtesy of TheBlaze.com...

Samurai Sword-Wielding Mormon Bishop Saves Woman From Attacker: ‘You Are So Done’

SALT LAKE CITY (AP) — A Samurai sword-wielding Mormon bishop helped a neighbor woman escape a Tuesday morning attack by a man who had been stalking her.

Hendrix and his weapon of choice (Photo Credit: AP)

Kent Hendrix woke up Tuesday to his teenage son pounding on his bedroom door and telling him somebody was being mugged in front of their house. The 47-year-old father of six rushed out the door and grabbed the weapon closest to him – a 29-inch high carbon steel Samurai sword.

 He came upon what he describes as a melee between a woman and a man. His son stayed inside to call 911 while he approached the man along with other neighbors who came to help. The martial arts instructor didn’t hesitate in drawing the sword and yelling at him to get on the ground.

“His eyes got as big as saucers and he kind of gasped and jumped back,” Hendrix said by phone Tuesday afternoon. “He’s probably never had anyone draw a sword on him before.”

The man ran down the street with the barefoot Hendrix and others in pursuit. Hendrix said he couldn’t catch the man before he fled in his car, but he picked up ChapStick that the man dropped and memorized his license plate.

“I yelled at him, ‘I’ve got your DNA and I’ve got your license plate: You are so done,’” Hendrix said.

The suspect, 37-year-old Grant Eggersten, turned himself in to police an hour later, said Unified Police Lt. Justin Hoyal.

No wonder!  Hendrix said this was his first time in thirty years of martial arts instruction that he's ever had to draw his sword.

 Tip of the hat to the one and only Erik Yaple for such a wacky good find!

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Sometimes, the headlines simply demand to write themselves.

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(And methinks Tricky should sign an endorsement deal with ACME while that iron is still hot.)

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7-year old boy doesn't want to go to church, heists car instead

A seven-year old lad in Plain City, Utah decided that it was too hot to go to church earlier this week.

So the kid sped off on a joyride in his dad's car.

911 calls soon flooded the Weber County Sheriff's Office about the pint-sized motorist. A dash-mounted video camera caught the following footage of the boy, who came to a stop and then dashed off (perhaps to find his mommy)...

Hey, that kid is driving better at 7 than I ever was at 16 :-P

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