My first foray into using an AI chatbot

No, I am still not going to "write" a blog post using artificial intelligence.  I'm sitting in front of a keyboard composing these words.  If you ever do see a product of AI being displayed, it's going to state as much.  Which is what I'm doing now.  What you are about to read is definitely the product of artificial intelligence.  It also represents the first time that I've used a "chatbot" to generate text.  Up until now I've avoided such things.  But as I'm currently involved in a project necessitating some familiarity with AI, there was little choice but to see what it is that I'm getting into.

A friend encouraged me to try ChatGPT.  I've been playing around with it since last night, firing hard at its walls.  And I have to say, I am intrigued.  One of the things I asked it to do was to describe the impact that the television series The Dukes of Hazzard had on high school football.  ChatGPT returned a thorough response in less than seven seconds.

This morning I tried something else: making the AI be "creative".  And now is where things start getting spooky.  The idea of a poem about the Orks from Warhammer 40,000 came to mind.  So I asked ChatGPT to compose some poetry featuring those wacky greenskins.

Here's what it came up with in the space of less than five seconds...

(I know I said previously that I wouldn't "copy and paste" an AI generated product, that I would only post screenshots.  I tried to make a screenshot with this but it was too big to fit onto one screen.  Sincerest apologies for that.)

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"An Ode To WAAAGH!" 

by ChatGPT
05/19/2024 10:15 am EST

In the grim dark of the far future’s expanse,

Where hope is a shadow and death is a dance,

There roams a green tide with a hunger for war,

The Orks of the cosmos, in battles they soar.

 

With tusks sharp as daggers and muscles like steel,

They bellow and brawl with a fiery zeal.

Their laughter is thunder, their fury a storm,

In chaos and mayhem, their spirits transform.

 

Through rusted machines that clatter and grind,

They fashion their weapons, a savage design.

With choppa and slugga, they charge into fight,

Under skies burning red with the blood of the night.

 

WAAAGH! is their battle cry, echoing wide,

A call to destruction, no foe left to hide.

They’re born from the spores of a war-torn land,

To crush and to conquer with a brutish hand.

 

Gork and Mork, their gods of might,

Guide them through darkness, through endless night.

One brutal, one cunning, both deities grand,

In their name, the Orks spread terror unplanned.

 

Yet, in their chaos, there’s a unity fierce,

A bond of the battle, a truth they pierce.

For in every clash, in every raid,

An Ork’s heart is joyous, in war it’s laid.

 

So, heed the green tide, the Orks in their thrall,

For when they come knocking, it’s the end of it all.

In the far future’s expanse, where the strong will prevail,

The Orks march to WAAAGH!, their endless tale.

 

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I have to admit, I am deeply impressed.  It's going to be very difficult to detect the use of AI already.  How convincing will it be even just a year from now?  What is going to happen to things like not only writing term papers and college theses, but also things like legal and business documents?  Would a minister delivering a sermon be found out if he had "cheated" with an AI chatbot?

AI can be a tool like anything else.  It can also be a crutch keeping us from discovering our fullest potential.  And in nefarious hands it can - and will - become a weapon.

As Yoda put it, "a dark place" this is taking us to.

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Warhammer 40,000: Boltgun: Carnage-filled fun for gamers of a certain age (and other people too!)

This coming December will mark thirty years since the original computer game Doom was released by id Software.  Gadzooks!!  Where did all that time go to?!?  Well, Doom sucked me in hard and refused to release its grip.  There had been a few first-person shooters before, notably id's own Wolfenstein 3-D.  But it was Doom that showed off the REAL potential of the genre.  And it broke the ground for other high-drama atmospheric entries in the category, like Star Wars: Dark Forces, Duke Nukem 3-D, and Quake.  Those in turn showed the way for more advanced games in the forthcoming generations, such as Halo and Call of Duty.

But no matter how advanced home computers and gaming consoles have become, my heart belongs to 1993's Doom and its contemporaries.  Especially for how editable it was, and it seemed like everyone and their brother was creating WAD files containing new graphics (my favorite is still the one that turned the Baron of Hell into Barney the Dinosaur), or sounds and music, right on up to new maps to play in.  Yes, the music was MIDI and the graphics were REALLY pixelated when you got up close to an element like scenery or an attacking monster... but that was just part of the charm.  Part of why I and many others came to love those games.

Well, a few weeks ago I heard about Warhammer 40,000: Boltgun, from Auroch Digital.  And what grabbed my attention was that it was created in the very same style of the Nineties-era first person shooters like Doom.  The game came out a few days ago and lo and behold a friend gifted it to me on Steam (where it's currently priced around twenty bucks).  So I installed Boltgun and played around with it.

Friends, that evening I felt what it was like to have played Doom for the very first time all those decades ago.  Auroch took the Warhammer 40,000 franchise and gave it a game it didn't know it needed.  If you're a "gamer of a certain age" who was among the first to play classic shooters, you will LOVE Boltgun.

The game has you playing a member of the Ultramarines chapter of the Adeptus Astartes (faux Imperial lingua franca for Space Marines).  If you ever played the Space Marine third-person game, you'll be especially delighted to learn that Boltgun takes place following that tale (and before the upcoming Space Marine II).  Your well-enhanced warrior, Malum Caedo, finds himself on the forge world of Graia.  Just like those Union Aerospace scientists did in Doom, it seems that the local techpriests got to messin' around with stuff they shouldn't have and opened a portal to Hel... I mean, the Warp.  Demons and mutant heretics and traitor marines have come through and are threatening the planet and all around it.  So as Caedo, you set out to make things right... by shootin', explodin', and chainsawin' every thing that's in your way.

Boltgun is an intense game, and the blocky pixelated blood and gore that splatters across your screen is all the more like enjoying a classic again.  Befitting a Warhammer 40,000 product, it is unfettered chaos and wreckage that will have you attacking anything and everything that moves.  I've gotten pretty good at taking aim with the selected firearm (mostly the boltgun) at relatively far targets, then rushing in to chainsword the baddie and any surrounding renegades.  It was like when I was playing Doom for the first time and came upon the chainsaw: Dad was walking past my room and had to see what I was giggling about.  I got the sense that he thought it was pretty gruesome (but also kind of funny).  Lord only knows what he would think of modern gaming.

I'm only three levels into the game, but felt it was already worth recommending to all two of this blog's readers.  I've been pretty well entertained by Boltgun so far.  What I would VERY much like to see however is for Auroch (provided that Games Workshop approves the concept) to open the game up for editing, just like we could do with many of the more popular first-person shooters of that epoch.  At the very least the studio could produce some add-on campaigns.  I would DEFINITELY pay to have Boltgun pitting the player against the Orks, or Tyranids (which reminds me of that legendary megaWAD that transformed Doom into the movie Aliens).

If you have fond memories of the gaming of thirty-some years ago, I think you'll like Boltgun.  It may also entice younger gamers to look around at the titles we had back then and give them a try also.

Warhammer 40,000: Boltgun can be found for purchase on Steam, again for about twenty bucks.  Not a bad deal if you're looking for something to vent a little angst and tension without having to shoot at the wall like Sherlock did.

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My latest Warhammer 40,000 miniature

Behold my new Ork big mek with kustom force field:

This is a model that I assembled three years ago, in the initial days of the COVID pandemic.  It seemed there wasn't going to be much travel for awhile, and there were a few Warhammer 40,000 minis that I had accumulated but never gotten around to giving much attention toward.  It was as good a thing as any to occupy myself with.  I put this together and it finally dawned on me that the lockdown could last months instead of weeks.  So he just kinda lingered unpainted on a shelf.

Anyway it's now 2023 and Warhammer 40K is hotter than ever and poised to get even bigger.  And I wanted to see if I still had my mad mini-painting skillz.  I'm rather pleased with how this little fella turned out.  So far as in-game mechanics goes, a big mek carrying a force field bestows a good level of protection for nearby friendly forces against enemy fire.

I need to come up with a name for him though.  I like to name my minis.  Gives them a little personality as they fight their way across the board.  I've already got my warboss Kaneegutz (left).  He's a character that I cobbled together from eight different kits.  That's a photo from a few months ago though.  Since then I've widened the base he's standing on with an adapter, and textured the base with astrogranite technical paint (available on Games Workshop's website and many game stores).  So he's "good 'n proppa" for battle.

Next up: a box of the new Ork boyz.  Unfortunately they don't have the pose-ability of the previous boyz minis (which I love) but I'm going to give the new guys a similar paint scheme and spread them around the units.  Infuse my squads with a little extra flavor.  Or maybe I should grant my lads some heavy support and get a deff dread.  That's one of the things why this is such a fun hobby: there's no one correct way to play.  Just go however it feels right for you.  Who knows, if I get good again I may put together a list and enter a tournament sometime.  That would be a lot of fun :-)

EDIT 02/19/2023 12:57 a.m.: I've decided to name my new big mek Erk DeffWelda.  After my good friend, true renaissance man, master welder and professional Santa Claus, Eric Smith.  Who has taught me much about life and he deserves being immortalized as a Warhammer miniature.  I look forward to unleashing him on the field of battle!

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Picking up an old hobby again

Way back around 2009 or so I got into the Warhammer 40,000 miniature game hobby.  It started with the now-legendary Assault on Black Reach boxed set, which included two armies: Space Marines and Orks.  I had a lot of fun putting the miniatures together and painting them, and then played against other people at game stores in Greensboro and Burlington.  There are a lot of different factions in Warhammer 40K but I gravitated toward the Orks as my favorite.  It's hard not to like a mob of green-skinned hooligans shootin' and cuttin' their way through the opposition all the while screaming "WAAAGH!"

In the years since I drifted toward other things, but Warhammer 40,000 never left my mind.  I love the setting, the lore, the beautiful miniatures, the various armies to choose from... there's a lot of good to be said about it.  The game is over 35 years old and is popular worldwide.

And it looks as if it's about to get even more popular.  The other week the announcement came that Henry Cavill is spearheading development of Warhammer 40,000 film and television projects for Amazon Prime.  Cavill became well known during the COVID pandemic for posting photos of his own miniatures.  The guy knows and respects Warhammer.  I trust him to deliver the goods.

Anyway, it seems as good a time as any to get back into the hobby.  This past week I returned to a miniature - an Ork Big Mek with Kustom Force Field - that I had glued together in the early days of the COVID lockdown.  It had been lingering unfinished for almost three years and I felt it needed to be "good 'n proppa".  I still have the paint I used back in the day and earlier tonight started working on the mini, only to find that my goblin green had become too thin to use.  A new bottle is on its way so I'll get back to that mini later this week.

But the Orks I've already had all this time deserve some loving care too.  For one thing they need to be adequately based, not just glued to the base.  I ordered some astrogranite paint from the Games Workshop site along with a texturing tool for spreading it.  The first mini to get its base so treated is the Weirdboy that I worked on around 2012.  Here's how it came out:

 

It's a plastic model and it originally had his left foot atop some debris on the ground.  I removed the debris with a knife so that it looks like he's got his leg raised.  Maybe he's trying to run away from the grots (the mini-orks) struggling to keep him chained down.  Whatever, I think he looks better than how the model comes as.

After I finish the Big Mek I'm going to bring my other miniatures up to snuff.  The base sizes for many of the minis has changed since I played last, so there are some special adapter rings that can be put on the pre-existing bases to make them the correct size.  Once that is done (to almost 40 Ork boyz) I'll be giving them the astrogranite treatment too.  And I'll need to also do further work on Warboss Kaneegutz: my custom-designed leader mini.

And once I'm satisfied with my Ork army... well, I've also been getting some Space Marines minis.  I've had in mind creating my own chapter.  Some years ago I had a thought that, surely there are some religions still active in the forty-first millennium, that hadn't been wiped out.  Inspired by the Dune novels I came up with the notion that the Jewish faith is still practiced in the far future.  What better way to be concealed than to hide in plain sight as a Space Marines chapter that nobody will question?  So drawing from history I'm going to make a chapter based on the Maccabees.  And name the minis after friends of mine (the chapter master will be Marco Solomonius).  I want it to be an army composed of traditional "standard" marines as well as the newer Primaris ones.  Just need to figure out a name for the chapter.  And color scheme of course.

Following that... who knows.  I may put together a small force of Word Bearers.  It might be fun to play a purely evil army every now and then.

I figure getting back into Warhammer 40K is going to be quite an enjoyable pastime.  It will also be something that will take my mind off of actively writing my book.  Some casual downtime may let my brain work subconsciously on what to write, without me actively addressing the matter.

Expect pics of more miniatures as they're completed :-)

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Warhammer 40,000 now needs Pre-K books (and I'm here to help!)

If you're at all a fan of Warhammer 40,000 whether you play the game or just are fascinated with the astounding body of fiction and art it has inspired, you probably got the the news yesterday that there are are childrens books coming out soon based on Warhammer 40,000 and its fantasy sibling Warhammer: Age of Sigmar.  At first I thought it was a joke but a quick look at Bell of Lost Souls confirmed that these are indeed being released in the near future.  Here are the first two:

Reaction from the fanbase has been mixed.  Some are applauding it, some think it's "too immature" whatever THAT means... especially coming from players of a game during which screams of "WAAAAGH!" are common.  Still others think that Games Workshop is playing a strategy of "get 'em while they're young" like tobacco companies, Democrats, the John Birch Society and freemium iPhone apps.  Personally, I like it!  Makes me wish I had a kid or two to justify getting these books (and it could still happen someday...)

'Course, it goes without saying that there are aspects of Warhammer 40K that are going to require a delicate hand in addressing for younger audiences.  Like f'rinstance, oh... I dunno... maybe Slaanesh (the Chaos god of sensual pleasure) and the whole thing about how the Dark Eldar like to spill out of nowhere to raid for victims to suck the lift force from.  And the Inquisition.  And why do Commisars seem to enjoy killing their own soldiers so much?  How the heck are they going to put Tyranids into this new series?

Well, I'm of the opinion that this is going to be a great success.  But since this is Games Workshop and their Black Library division we're discussing, maybe we should prepare for the inevitability of 40K books for an even younger readership.  Like, ages 3 through kindergarten.  So with that in mind, I took the liberty of making the first in the series of the next generation's introduction to the far future:

Dear Games Workshop: disregarding the fact that I am not a British subject, please feel free to contact me about my percentage of the sales.  I'll take either Pound sterling or an entire company of my choice of Primaris Space Marine miniatures (including the new Roubute Guilliman).  And if you ever bring Lorgar back I'll take him too.

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Social commentary from the grim darkness of the far future

Y'know, if the Emperor of Mankind hadn't embarked upon his crusade to wipe out ALL religion from humanity, the galaxy would have been a much better place.  Some things are too ingrained into the human psyche.  The need for spirituality is one of them.  Attempt to deprive a people of that, and disaster will be the outcome.

Anyhoo, just an idea for a pic that crossed my gray matter last week.  Had a dilly of a time finding the right image from the Horus Heresy but in the end Horus himself cuts a fine jib.

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Warhammer 40K wildly popular among U.S. military personnel

Warhammer 40,000 Sixth Edition came out over two months ago and I still haven't gotten to play with the new rules! Just been busy on multiple fronts. Which makes me look positivalutely pathetic compared to what these dedicated players go through...

Slate Magazine has a terrific article about how the futuristic tabletop war game is incredibly popular among the men and women (okay, mostly men) of the United States armed forces, and especially with many who are serving overseas in places like Afghanistan (including players such as Army Sgt. Steffan McBee, pictured). Warhammer 40K's publisher Games Workshop estimates that perhaps 25 percent of its very large American player base are active-duty personnel: some of whom go to great lengths to have their stockpiles of miniatures shipped safely to their duty posts around the globe.

What's the appeal of a war game played on tabletops with plastic and metal models? Members of the armed forces enjoy the tactical thinking and execution critical to carrying out a 40K battle. But there is also the more hobby-ish aspect of assembling, painting and oftentimes customizing the models. One Marine comments that the strenuous regimented lifestyle of the Corps obligates an attention to detail that carries over well into the grim darkness of the far future that is Warhammer 40K.

It's a most excellent write-up by Alan Siegel, and one that'll have you appreciating anew what our armed service folks do to keep themselves entertained far from home. And hey, as a devout Ork player it makes me proud to be in good company with United States Marines who also enjoy a fine WAAAGH! :-)

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3-D Printing: The next battleground for digital copyright law?

Been a might busy on numerous fronts lately so I haven't had much of a chance to get in a game of Warhammer 40,000 in awhile (though that also owes to the fact that I've been building up my army of Orks, muhahahahahaha!!!)

Anyhoo, it's from the world of 40K which this next item comes from. Seems that Swedish torrent-trackin' site/political party/new religious denomination The Pirate Bay, which has already made a name for itself letting users search for songs, movies, video games and books, has now added 3-D models to its database.

Which means that through the ever-improving technology of 3-D printing, it is now possible to download physical objects via the Internet.

Here's how it works: you download the model and using a 3-D printer, the computer lays down layer upon layer of plastic or resinous material, gradually building-up a physical object. Right now the technology is still pretty rough, not to mention hideously expensive. But, it's rapidly getting cheaper and more refined...

So only a week or so since The Pirate Bay started offering links to 3-D models and already they're in legal trouble. Lo and behold this first bit o' litigation comes from Games Workshop, the producers of the wildly popular Warhammer 40,000 miniatures wargame. As was reported on the Huffington Post's website, Games Workshop sent a cease and desist order to The Pirate Bay after finding that one user had uploaded a 3-D file from which folks could download a Space Marines Dreadnought.

Lemme 'splain why this is significant. In the universe of 40K, a Dreadnought is a bipedal walking tank piloted by a Space Marine who, though grievously wounded and near death on his own, is given a new lease on life as a cyborg. And the model for this attractive bit of tactical tabletop weaponry costs in the neighborhood of fifty dollars American.

Now you start to understand why Games Workshop is eager to nip this in the bud before it has a chance to blossom. Games Workshop is charging copyright infringement and The Pirate Bay has acquiesced by removing the link to the model's file.

I can see why this will be a problem. And as much as many people complain about the high cost of Games Workshop's models, I for one can understand it. The craftsmanship of that company's artists is top-notch: we're not only buying the models, we're giving compensation to the men and women who come up with these crazy good minis!

But even so, and as many of this blog's readers know already, I have a lot of issues with much of digital copyright law, while at the same time absolutely respecting the rights of the content's originators.

Wanna know what I think? The quality of the finished products are fairly crappy. At least, they are right now. That won't last for much longer though. And when the time comes when 3-D printing is as ubiquitous on our desktops as the monitor and speakers, companies like Games Workshop should not only be ready for it but embrace it as a new market. I can certainly see Games Workshop selling official 3-D models to print via a client application right at your own computer. Need some new appendages for those Tyranids? Just click "buy" and you'll be entitled to one digitally-rights managed set of horrific slashing arms for your gene-stealers! Need more? Simply add to your quantity of purchased product. Easy-peasey, Japan-easy! Games Workshop gets its due and the end user gets official models and parts for his or her army! Hey, that's the model which has worked wonders for iTunes. I don't see any reason why it won't work for 3-D printing either.

There's some exuberant discussion going on right now at Bell of Lost Souls, my favorite 40K-dedicated blog (I visit it several times a day, and they cover a lot of other wargaming mini systems as well). Definitely worth checking out to see what other, more seasoned wargamers are saying about the implications of 3-D printing not only on this hobby but on culture as a whole.

As for how things stack up currently, I don't think Games Workshop needs to worry itself too much. Here's a picture of the printable Dreadnought in question...

Good Lord, that thing is HIDEOUS!! I wouldn't dare bring such a fugly model to the table. Nor would any other respectable 40K player. Even the ones who allowed that one guy to use a Coke can as a substitute for a Carnifex.

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IP Masochism: Games Workshop C&D craziness promises customer blowback

I caught on Slashdot this morning that Games Workshop, the publisher of Warhammer 40,000 (which I have gotten into this past year) has sent a very harsh cease & desist to BoardGameGeek, a website devoted to all things pertaining to tabletop gaming. The C&D from Games Workshop has ordered BoardGameGeek to "remove all fan-made players' aids. This includes scenarios, rules summaries, inventory manifests, scans to help replace worn pieces -- many of these created for long out of print, well-loved games. GW did this shortly after building a lot of good will by re-releasing their out of print game 'Space Hulk' to much hoopla."

What the hell is Games Workshop thinking?

Ya know, I'm no stranger to the crazy world of alleged "copyright infringement". And even though my situation was in the purview of the American legal system and Games Workshop is a company based in the United Kingdom, some things are common sense no matter where the jurisdiction is. I didn't mind it that my TV commercial was picked up and broadcast without my permission: I was too honored that so many (like E!'s The Soup and Jay Leno) found it interesting, thought-provoking and funny enough to share with others than to get angry at them for it.

So it should be with Games Workshop. Especially in these days of downturned global economy. Fans of Warhammer 40,000 and other Games Workshop products are doing the company a huge favor by demonstrating their love and loyalty to the game and its fictional universe. It's free advertising that Games Workshop doesn't have to spend a single pound or dollar on. The company had already come to rely on word of mouth to maintain and generate interest in Warhammer 40,000. Well, that's all it is that these fans are doing. There is no intent to violate intellectual property on their part, and every intention to support the game.

But it looks like Games Workshop has no intention of likewise supporting the players, and is even choosing to punish them for their enthusiasm.

This will come back to haunt Games Workshop in the end. Maybe not in the short term but in the long range of vision this is going to drive away many of even the most loyal customers that they currently enjoy. What Games Workshop is doing is not good marketing at all. The company needs to reconsider its position and like yesterday, if it wants Warhammer 40,000 to continue with anything like robust growth.

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Chris Knight's somewhat typical Sunday

Right now: catching up on e-mail and news.

Later: writing more of the novel that I've been working on for National Novel Writing Month, which as things stand now won't be finished by the end of November because of all the good stuff that I'm finding to add into it. But what will be done by then should still be enough to meet the 150-pages needed to qualify as "done" for the month. I'll just put the finishing touches on it later :-)

Later still: painting some more of my army of Orks for Warhammer 40,000 and then laying out all my works for turkey frying on Thursday.

And done already this morning: videography of the baptisms of a friend's children at a church in Greensboro. I'd never done a baptismal job before.

Maybe someday I'll get to film a bris. But please... no tipping! :-P

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Warhammer 40,000 battle report: "Komedy of Errors" as Orks slaughter Chaos Space Marines!

Finally got to return to the friendly local game store after business the past two weeks kept me from indulging in one of my latest newfound pastimes: Warhammer 40,000. But in the interim I've been building up a new army. Ever since this past winter I've been playing Space Marines of the Ultramarines chapter (the ones that come in the Warhammer 40,000: Assault on Black Reach intro set). Lately though I've thought about changing things up a bit, and Space Marines of various stripes do tend to be the most popular faction anyway, what with every player seeming to possess at least one army of the Emperor of Mankind's most faithful servants.

So for the past few weeks I've been getting my first army of Orks ready for battle. And the timing was perfect, 'cuz as a personal rule I never field any model until I'm satisfied that it looks good. If my soldiers are going to fight and possibly die for me, then they merit enough respect for me to paint them like they deserve, right?

Anyhoo, today I threw my Orks into combat for the first time. Four players this afternoon at our table. There was me with a little less than 500 points worth of Orks...

And here's my Ork Warboss. I think he's unique/powerful/ugly enough to need a proper name: anyone have any suggestions?

Playing with me today was Tom, who brought along a gnarly collection of Tyranids (think of the Borg from Star Trek crossed with the Bugs from Starship Troopers). Normally Tyranids and Orks don't get along 'cuz Orks fight everything and Tyranids eat everything. But this game (as chosen by a roll of the die) was a "unit/points" thingy, where destroying anything considered a unit is 1 point and the side with the most points at the end winning. Let's just assume for today's battle that these are Tyranids cut off from the Hive mind that are maddened or the Orks are using in battle or something. Anyhoo, here's Tom...

And playing a whole bunch of Chaos Space Marines were Brandon and Joe. Joe is also Tom's kid brother, and it was evident from the start that he was out to "show up" Tom. This was also Brandon and Joe's very first time playing Warhammer 40,000, so naturally a lot of the adults were on hand to show them what to do/all the tricks etc.

But look in Brandon and Joe's eyes. Yup, two more poor unfortunate souls that have been ensnared by Warhammer 40,000. I saw them earlier oggling the Assault on Black Reach intro set, which is like the "gateway drug" for this hobby. Way too late for you now kids: you're in deep and the hole goes very far indeed...

Admittedly, the first few rounds did not go well for our side. Both squads of my Ork Boyz took light casualties at long distance from Chaos Space Marine fire and neither of the Big Shootas that I was armed with hit anything. I decided to push the Orks forward and engage at close range (which turned out to have been a very wise thing in the long run).

Meanwhile, Tom and Joe were having at each other in what must be the most hilarious thing that I have seen playing Warhammer 40,000 thus far. Joe brought forth his Chaos-possessed Dreadnought, which quickly lost what I call the "insanity roll" and went mad and plowed headlong toward Tom's swarm of Tyranid Termagants...

...and then the Termagants completely overwhelmed the Chaos Dreadnought!

The Chaos Space Marine Dreadnought was hopelessly engaged for the rest of the game fighting off the Termagants. And as you can see from the pic above, that freed my Nobz to press forward without having that to worry about.

The Ork offensive was well underway...

Soon afterward however, one squad of "da Boyz" engaged in close quarters combat with the Space Marines and were, to an Ork, wiped out. And in the next round my other squad of Boyz were completely killed off too after I had declared a Waaagh! (the one time that kamikaze-style tactics failed to carry this day). So in retaliation my Warboss took on a Chaos-claimed Rhino bare-handed. Well, if you count the power claw as being a hand too...

The results of that bit o' mayhem were one destroyed Rhino which blew up and no damage taken by the Warboss! It was the start of a great green tide that would soon wash over the landscape.

I must confess though: at this point I thought it was pretty hopeless 'cuz with both squads of Boyz gone, all I had were my Warboss and the Nobz. But as this was my first time playing Orks I had no idea just how strong the Nobz really were. First they utterly over-ran one squad of Chaos Space Marines and took their mad Waaagh! right to into Brandon and Joe's hapless faces...

I still can't believe I was rolling so many 5s and 6s during this murderous rampage.

So with the Nobz destroying two squads of Chaos Marines (and taking only one casualty among their own) the mighty Orks turned to the last two opposing unit left with any real fighting capability...

And a few minutes later, it was all over...

The cunning and beguiling forces of Chaos had fallen to the dumb and ugly Orks! Which, I guess in the higher scheme of the universe, means that this was ultimately a victory for Good. Orks aren't really evil: they're just that way by nature. Hey, J.R.R. Tolkien even said that his Orcs would not be eternally beyond redemption, so I like to think that the Orks in the Warhammer 40,000 universe have some positive inherent value too.

Or maybe I've just been spending too much time painting and detailing Orks lately :-P They're definitely my favorite army to play in this game for the time being, mainly 'cuz they're such a rich source of comedic value (even though their shooting abilities leave much to be desired).

Next week: the Orks are back and hopefully by then I'll have my Gretchins and Deffkoptas ready (and maybe even something a little "shokking" ;-)

EDIT 11:45 p.m. EST: I've come up with a name for my Ork Warboss. Think I'm gonna call him Kaneegutz! Which is sort of the Ork-ish corruption of my last name (and it sounds like "ka-neeguts" from Monty Python and the Holy Grail). And doesn't "Waaagh! Kaneegutz" sound like a great title for an Ork crusade? :-)

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After-action report on today's Warhammer 40,000 battle: Space Marines versus Orks and Chaos

It was not a good day to have played loyalist Space Marines.

And not even the presence of the mighty Marneus Calgar himself - chapter master of the Ultramarines - was enough to stave off the combined threat of a massive Ork Waaaagh! led by Ghazghkull Thraka and a surprise attack by several squads of Chaos Space Marines who appeared on the scene to... well, spread chaos.

So today was the first time in three weeks that I've been able to get down to the nearest friendly local game store (FLGS) for a battle or two of Warhammer 40,000, the far-flung future-based miniature wargame that's wildly popular all over the world. Once again I brought several squads of Space Marines from the Ultramarine chapter. By 3:30 a new game was starting with 1,800 points of tactical value allowed for each side. Now, my own complete Space Marines only number a little over 500 points... but as there were two others playing Space Marines we mustered our forces along the eastern side of the table. Leading our forces was the indomitable Marneus Calgar (a miniature that I'll probably be adding to my own collection sometime). Before us stretched the landscape of a world held by the Orks, and among the more prominent features was a tower of some sort (we figured it was an oil derrick drilling for Ork petroleum). But no matter why we were there: we determined to enforce the will of the Emperor of Humanity... and the Orks were goin' die!

I think those of us playing the Space Marines had a feeling not long into Turn 1 that this battle was going to be especially brutal. First it was our entire squad of Scouts that we lost, and I was hoping we could get to use them to great advantage with their sniper skill. Alas! The Scouts were among the first to go, perishing by the guns of Ork heavy weaponry. At the same time a squadron of three Ork Deffkoptas attempted to take out my Dreadnought but he easily evaded the attack (for the moment). And then as if we didn't have enough to worry about, a squad of Chaos Space Marines attempted to teleport in front of our forces. However these missed a roll and wound up stuck intangible amid the wildness of the Warp, so for the time being we didn't have to worry about these traitors to the Empire.

Meanwhile on the southern end of the table the battle was becoming one of heavy hardware as several Space Marine troop carriers and tanks engaged with Ork battlewagons and a number of Chaos Space Marine vehicles. Calgar himself was put in the midst of this action which saw at least one troop carrier explode (and costing the lives of all the Space Marines within it). I wish that I could report more about the southern front of the battle however as we were too busy holding down the northern end, that's the part that held my attention throughout the nearly three hours that we were in combat.

After the Orks and Chaos forces had resolved their moves and weapons fire for Turn 1, now came our turn. My own Space Marines killed four Orks with fragmentary grenade fire, and attempted to move into position to better engage the huge swarm that was the rest of the northern Ork forces... which threatened to overwhelm my position. And now I was faced with a tactical decision: should I attempt to take out the Deffkoptas or the ground-based Orks? After conferring with fellow "general" John, we decided to concentrate the next attack on the Deffkoptas...

...unfortunately, not long into Round 2 the Deffkoptas utterly destroyed my Dreadnought in one fell swoop!

And then the rest of the Orks rushed forward in a frenzy of lust and death:

From there, nothing worked. The Tactical squad of my Space Marines that was armed with missile fire still attempted to destroy the Deffkoptas... but on my roll I only got a 1! That wasn't just a miss, it was as miss as you can possibly get (think Stormtroopers from the original Star Wars movies).

As for the rest of the battle: the Orks made mincemeat out of my Space Marines and none of my rolls went good (save for taking out five Orks with one well-placed shot of fragmentary grenade). One by one I was having to remove the shattered corpses of my trusty Ultramarines from the field of battle. The Orks on the northern end moved down the battlefield to join their brethren, and the Deffkoptas roared ahead to continue their carnage.

All that was left after that was basically mop-up action as the Chaos Space Marines and the Orks decimated what remained of the Ultramarines. Marneus Calgar himself somehow made it off to fight another day, and Ork warleader Ghazghkull Thraka let out a howl of victory...

What happened next? Well, it was 7 p.m. and I was starving so it was time for me to grab some dinner. I can only imagine that the Orks and Chaos forces then turned on each other (and probably it was the Orks who started it).

So there's another week before the league at the aforementioned friendly local game store meets again to throw our armies of Space Marines, Orks, Tyranids, Chaos at each other: plenty of time to study tactics and maybe even bolster my forces (I'm thinking maybe about investing in a Rhino tank).

By the way, if you play Warhammer 40,000 also and are in the Greensboro/Reidsville/Burlington area or so, write me at theknightshift@gmail.com and I'll fill ya in on the very exuberant league we've got going, and I'm always up for having a good-natured battle with a new friend :-)

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Finished my first WARHAMMER 40,000 army

A few days ago I wrote about how I'd gotten into the Warhammer 40,000 miniature wargame hobby, and had my first batch of troopers ready for action. Today, since the alleged threat of severe winter weather has supposedly been good enough reason to stay inside, I finished the rest of the Space Marines that come with the Warhammer 40,000: Assault on Black Reach intro set. Last night I spent about 4 hours detailing the Space Marine Captain. This morning I set to work on the Dreadnought, which was a lot of fun to play around with!

Anyhoo, here it is: my very first completed playable army for Warhammer 40,000. Behold the brave men of the Ultramarines chapter...

At the top left: 4 Space Marines in Terminator armor. At the top right are 9 Space Marines in standard armor. Between them is an Ultramarine Dreadnought (a crippled Space Marine throw into a "mini AT-AT"). At bottom left is the Terminator Sergeant, while a Space Marine Veteran Sergeant is at the bottom right and between them bearing the Ultramarines banner is the Space Marine Commander.

So, how'd they turn out? I'm taking 'em into battle for the first time this coming week! :-)

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My very first WARHAMMER 40,000 army!

It's taken about a month of on-and-off work, but tonight I put the finishing touches on eight pieces of my first playable army for Warhammer 40,000...

So yeah, now I've gotten into Warhammer 40,000: a game that some have told me "is worse than crystal meth, don't even think about it Chris!" But I couldn't help myself. Recently I got back into playing BattleTech for the first time since college, and some people commenting on this blog said I should give Warhammer 40,000 a try. I ended up playing a game over the Christmas break, liked the experience, and that propelled me to HyperMind in Burlington where I bought the Warhammer 40,000: Assault on Black Reach intro set. It comes with 17 Space Marine miniatures, 29 Ork miniatures (including three riding "Deffkoptas"), basic rulebook, dice, rulers, templates, plus a book that introduces the Warhammer 40,000 universe and a sheet of waterslide decals for your minis. If you're looking for an inexpensive route into the Warhammer 40,000 miniatures wargame, the Assault on Black Reach set is the way to go right now.

As you can see if you know anything about Warhammer 40,000, I chose to build a Space Marines army with my initial foray into the hobby, and opted to make them the Ultramarines chapter. Maybe someday I'll create my own chapter (I've a really strange idea for one that worships the forty-thousand year old ancient visage of Alfred E. Neuman, making his face a harbinger of death). But for now these little Ultramarine guys - along with the commander, sergeant, Terminators and the Dreadnought that are also now being prepared - get to be the first that I'll be sending into battle against Orks, Tyranids, and the Traitor Legions of Chaos. And later on I might build some Eldar and Tau armies, 'cuz I kinda like those too.

Okay so what I really want to know is: how did I do decorating my first Warhammer 40,000 minis?! :-)

(And if you want to know more about Warhammer 40,000, I'll heartily recommend Bell of Lost Souls.)

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