100% All-Natural Composition
No Artificial Intelligence!

Saturday, November 19, 2005

Saturdays just won't be the same again: Kyle Williams signs off from WorldNetDaily

I don't know WHAT I'm going to do first-thing every Saturday morning from this point on. It had become an ingrained ritual that before anything else I would turn on the computer, point the browser to WorldNetDaily and read the newest column from Kyle Williams. I need to say this too: Kyle is not just an amazing writer, he is a truly wonderful young man that I have been immensely humbled to have the honor of having as a true friend. For four years he has been a wunderkind of the first order to behold. Today marks his final column at WorldNetDaily before taking his unique intellect into pursuit of other projects. He'll still have his blog though, which he better update often 'cuz some of us need our "fix" :-)

Kyle, good luck and God speed. And thanks for the lil' nod at the end of your column today: it seriously made my weekend!! :-)

Friday, November 18, 2005

She won't last two months

Rugged individualist extraordinaire Claire Wolfe is cutting herself off from the Internet for one year. I'm thinking of doing this for one week, but for a year?! Here's hoping that she comes to her senses: we need her. But if she comes out better for doing this, then nothing but best wishes for her.

Superman Returns teaser has been online since last night...

...and in the 24 hours since it debuted I've watched this, probably twenty times at least. This is the time of the year when the "teasers" for the next summer's blockbusters start appearing, giving us a taste of what's to come. Last year I especially remember the one for Revenge of the Sith and that downright disturbing one for Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Well, after seeing the one for Superman Returns, I don't think I've been this jazzed about an upcoming summer release since the one for Spider-Man 2 a couple years back.
What makes this so beautiful to me is how it uses both John Williams' classic Superman: The Movie music and some of Marlon Brando's dialogue from the original, alongside some images from the new movie. It's about as overwhelming a teaser as you're likely to behold in every way. Head over to the official Superman Returns website and check it out in full glorious Quicktime!

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire review

They just keep getting better and better. And darker and darker.

I hooked up with Darth Larry, his wife and several of their compatriots (a lot of 'em from UNC-Greensboro's music program) last night about 11 over at the Carousel Grande in Greensboro. Lots of youngish (i.e. 10-14 year olds) people. Plenty of folks in costume, including one girl who came as Moaning Myrtle, complete with toilet bowl lid around her neck: wish I'd brought my camera to get a pic of that. Otherwise it was mostly generic Hogwarts students/witch getups. Theater manager came out about five minutes before the show and asked everyone not to take pictures while the movie was playing. At 12:01 a.m. on the dot the promo slides ended and the trailers began.

The only two that really come to mind were the teasers for Happy Feet out a year from now (it looks like March of the Penguins on steroids) and Hoodwinked, which looks funny enough that I might have to check this out next month. Carousel Grande DID NOT HAVE the teaser for Superman Returns playing in front of Goblet of Fire as it was supposed to, which is a real darn shame because, I caught this trailer just before leaving for the theater and it is epic. Woulda been great to see it on the big screen :-(

And then came the movie...

Folks, it must be said early on that there is considerably much detail in this movie that went missing from the book. The opening chapters with the Weasleys arriving at the Dursley home to pick up Harry are gone, which I hated 'cuz that would have been a really funny thing to have seen on film. Prominently missing also is the entire "House Elf Liberation Front" subplot, which would have given Hermione much more to do in terms of her character. So too is the resolution of the entire Rita Skeeter thread. Maybe a few other things like that. Otherwise, if you can overlook those things, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire is one heckuva good ride.

It basically does start out with the book's very first chapter, then jumps to the Quidditch World Cup, which was VERY well done: easily the most special-effects filled sequence in any Harry Potter movie to date. I'm wanting to see this movie again just to try and take in EVERYTHING that happens in these scenes. One thing I happened to notice that elicited a smile: when Minister Fudge is opening the ceremonies, take a look at Barty Crouch sitting behind him and to the right-hand side of the screen. The seat next to Crouch is empty. That detail isn't delved into anymore in the movie, but readers of the book will understand the significance of it.

Right after the World Cup final comes the Death Eaters attack. It's as scary as you might imagine it, but I'm making note of it because it's here that I first took notice of Patrick Doyle's score. The music that plays during the attack is malevolent and sinister... part of me wants to say it sounds positively Lovecraftian. This is just the first of many great pieces that are in this movie, including the later themes for Beauxbatons and Durmstrang, the music for the Triwizard events, and especially what is used for the Yule Ball. Doyle had a mighty baton to pick up after the work John Williams did for the previous three entries, but he really came through here. The Yule Ball music, that alone is going to drive me to purchase the soundtrack (assuming it has the piece by the Weird Sisters on it).

One of the real strengths of this movie is that all the characters, without any notable exception, are almost exactly as they were portrayed in the books, including the new ones. Whatever you envision as you read Goblet of Fire, that's how they will likely appear to you here. The one everyone is going to be talking about is Brendan Gleeson's portrayal of Alastor "Mad-Eye" Moody, which was DEAD-on from the original novel, except I always envisioned him looking even more torn-up/brutalized. Barty Crouch Sr. is precisely how I saw him in the book: right down to the icy stare he gives as he disowns his only son and sentences him to Azkaban. And speaking of Barty Crouch Jr., David Tennant does a wicked job bringing him to life: he's sort of like the Charles Manson Family member of the Voldemort crew. This is really going to be Tennant's season to shine: he takes on the role of the Doctor full-time during next month's Doctor Who Christmas special, and I'm seriously looking forward to what he does with the character.

Richard Harris was a great Dumbledore in the first two movies. And Michael Gambdon did a pretty good job taking over after Harris died. But here in Goblet of Fire, Gambdon comes into his own completely. He is Dumbledore, Lord willing now and forever, and he brings an incredible combination of both tenderness and ferocity to the role.

This is the best Hagrid that Robbie Coltrane has been since the original. It's an absolute delight watching the romance blossom between him and Madame Maxim.

Fans of Neville Longbottom: this is your movie. He has come a long way as a character, and a deeper one than most might have suspected at that. The scene in Moody's class, where we see Neville recoil in anguish at seeing use of the Cruciatus curse: we're never told why it is in the movie that he reacts this way, though if you've read the books you know better. Terrific, subtle set-up for future movies, that is. But most of all I really had to smile at how of all the leading young male student characters, it was Neville who had the best time at the Yule Ball.

Speaking of THAT, the Yule Ball might be my favorite scene in the whole movie. It's just fun to watch. Except for poor Harry and Ron, who look so wasted you'd think they're smashed on booze. Ron looks particularly horrible: that tuxedo looks like it was stolen from Liberace's corpse. In stark contrast Emma Watson looks positively STUNNING as Herminone in this scene. She has really become a very lovely young lady.

Viktor Krum and Fleur Delacour... apart from Krum's appearance at the World Cup and their competing in the tournament, there wasn't nearly enough time given to these two. Or to their schools for that matter. I was looking forward to seeing more from the other two wizarding schools out there. But it's a long book and there's only time to show so much. Clémence Poésy is really sweet as Fleur in the scenes she's in though, and Stanislav Ianevski's Viktor Krum... well, he just rules, man. Of all the new characters, he's the one I would have loved to have seen more of, especially at the World Cup. There's a REASON Krum is so well renowned in the books, and we didn't really see why in the movie. But based on Ianevski's portrayal of him, I'll trust that it's there.

Ralph Fiennes as Voldemort. If he had more screen time he would have out-uglied Emperor Palpatine as the year's most evil villainous creep. We see Voldemort in two forms: "Baby Voldemort" before Wormtail throws him in the reviving cauldron, and then "Mega-Gollum" full-size Voldemort. I can now finally believe in Voldemort as being the supreme bad guy of this story. We didn't see enough of him in Sorceror's Stone and that wasn't really the full-bore Voldemort we caught in Chamber of Secrets. Like so many other characters in this chapter, Voldemort has come into his own, and Fiennes brings every ounce of his ability at playing pure evil to the role. Can't wait to see what he does with the character in the Order of the Phoenix movie.

As for Harry, Ron and Hermione, the trio that this story has revolved around: they are maturing quite nicely if aging a little too quickly. Harry is maturing especially. Daniel Radcliffe is letting Harry become more and more edgy, by the end of the movie he's definitely on the path toward full-tilt grim that we know he's embarked upon by the end of Order of the Phoenix. It is going to be excruciatingly painful to watch what he does when Half-Blood Prince comes around. I'm almost dreading it, knowing the storm of you-know-what that he's yet to face.

Sirius Black is given one brief scene. In a fireplace. And that's it. I wanted to see seriously more Sirius this go-round. Especially after knowing what happens to him in the next chapter. I wanted to see more of Viktor Karkaroff and Severus Snape. Come to think of it, apart from maybe two scenes Snape has hardly anything to do in this movie. Oh well, Alan Rickman's time is coming soon enough...

The effects work in Goblet of Fire are sensational. Maybe even more beautiful than those used in Revenge of the Sith. The arrival of the two schools' contingents is exactly how I thought it would look like, and the tournaments trials - especially the dragons and the mer-people - were pure eye candy.

Geez, what else is there to say about Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire?

How about that it's dark. Not as overwhelming as Revenge of the Sith was, but there is real tragedy that comes into the story here. We see a really wonderful character introduced, Cedric Diggory, and he's made out to be every bit the nice, upstanding young man. The kind of young man that any father would wish his son to grow into. And he gets taken away without any damned reason why. Folks, I gotta tell you: the movie made Diggory's death hurt more than how it was done in the book. And that's saying a lot. There's a horrible sense of foreboding by the end of the movie, but a kind of hopefulness as well. I'd say that Goblet of Fire is The Empire Strikes Back of the Harry Potter saga: it ends on something of a cliffhanger in that the bad guys have apparently won this round, but it's not a horribly *lingering* cliffhanger. There's still hope to be found yet. It is here that I thought Dumbledore had his best scene in the movie. And it ends on good terms - or at least as good as you can expect things after the tragedy - for Harry, Ron and Hermione.

What else can I say about this?

Well, as I said before, it doesn't have EVERYTHING in the book that I'd wished it had. But given the constraints of time, the movie is still a very elegant dance to behold. Definitely worth catching at least twice in the theaters. I'll give it 9 stars out of 10, if I were ranking it on that kind of scale. And I'm absolutely looking forward to watching it again.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Goblet of Fire midnight showing tonight

I'll be catching Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire at midnight tonight along with Darth Larry (who word on the street has it is playing a mean cello in a production of H.M.S. Pinafore today at UNC-Greensboro). He called about it the other day and I said "sure" way before it registered with my brain how long this movie is going to be. At more than three hours this'll put us WAY into the morrow's dawn, definitely territory I haven't been in since the last Lord of the Rings movie. We'll see if my system can still hold up after teaching all day today, then something else that won't have me back home 'til 8, then the flick and then back teaching again tomorrow and possibly seeing Goblet of Fire again tomorrow night with my wife. Nice to know that even with added responsibilities I'm still up for crazy stunts. We're also hoping to catch Walk the Line this weekend, so expect maybe a double-barreled movie review coming up in a few days.

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Clips from The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe soundtrack hit online

SoundtrackNet has clips from each track from the soundtrack of The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe that you can listen to. Know this though: listening to these demands that you have absolutely the latest version of Quicktime on your system. I installed a new version just a few weeks ago, and I still had to upgrade it tonight to get this to work. You also may need to refresh the pop-up window that has the clip. And even then, it was extremely slow to begin playing. But from what we heard so far (clips from "The Blitz, 1940" and "The Wardrobe") it sounds pretty good. Not as resonating as the music from the 1979 animated version though, which I'm especially thinking of the score that plays during the stag hunt: undoubtedly one of the most hauntingly beautiful compositions I've ever heard in my entire life. Believe me, it would be well worth buying the DVD of this just to listen to that one track. But this is just a tiny portion of the entire score from the 2005 version: I'll reserve full judgement until I can listen to it all, accompanying what transpires onscreen. In the meantime, whet your appetite on these snippets!

We watched The Jerk tonight on AMC

Lisa had never seen this before until tonight. I'd last caught it maybe ten years ago and had forgotten how funny this is. It's sort of more uplifting now for some reason. Lisa likes to tell me that I'll probably look like Steve Martin in another ten years or so: that's an encouraging thought I guess :-) Anyhoo, pretty good comedy in case you've never caught it before.

Getting geared up to start teachin' again

Had a brief orientation this morning at the place that I'm going to be teaching at. Oh yeah, WHAT will I be teaching? Much like my last educatin' gig: teaching computer and Internet skills, but also things like basic keyboarding. Anyway, this place I'm going to be at is really great: I'm gonna be working alongside a lot of neat people, and one thing that I learned today that abounds at this place is a strong sense of humor. Also was delighted to learn that there's several other people who went to Elon there, including one who was there right when I was. Will be reporting on how this all goes down as the weeks and months (and years?) progress :-)

Monday, November 14, 2005

Did the original Christians worship the military?

Found a compelling piece by Laurence M. Vance at the LewRockwell.com site. Titled "The Early Christian Attitude to War", it's a look at how Christian believers toward the beginning of the church viewed military and political power. And, it's a pretty damning case against modern "Christian" virtues like worshipping our armed might or status in the world. Vance begins thusly...
Were the early Christians warmongers like too many Christians are today? Did they idolize the Caesars like some Christians idolize President Bush? Did they make signs that said "the emperor" similar to the ones we see on cars today that refer to Bush as "the president"? Did they make apologies for the Roman Empire like some Christian apologists make for the U.S. Empire? Did they venerate the institution of the military like many Christians do today?

C. John Cadoux would say no.

Mash down here for plenty more.

Remember: These guys are President Bush's very bestest friends

A teacher in Saudi Arabia will spend 40 months in prison and receive 750 lashes by public flogging... for talking about the Bible and saying good things about the Jewish people.

Lest we forget how close "Christian" President Bush is to those who rule Saudi Arabia...

Shining

Click here. No questions, just do as I say. Props to Phillip Arthur for finding this.

The funniest graphic I've ever made

So last night I was talking to a friend on the phone about some things, and one thing was leading to another, a couple of crazy connections going on across the ol' synapses... and one of the funniest ideas I've ever thought of popped into my head.

I've been working on it for most of the night. This was just one of those things that once the notion of it possesses you, you're on fire for it. This was something like Forcery was, but it's a heckuva lot easier working with Photoshop than it is to make a film. So most of the past several hours I've spent hunched over the keyboard, scouring the 'net for certain visual elements (which were surprisingly hard to find, but the perfect one did turn up) and a new font or two, to match up with the ones used in the original. And apart from some very minor tweaking, I think I achieved the final form of the thing a short while ago. And it's really hilarious.

"So where is this thing?" Well, that's the bad news: I can't show it right now. Even though I'm dying to share this with the world. If I posted this graphic now it would - not "might" but "would" - cause a helluva lot of confusion that I would be scrambling to clarify. There would be wild rumors flying all over the place because of it. And it would just totally ruin the moment that this is really meant for.

So for the time being I'm going to sit on it. I've passed it along to a VERY few friends, just to see what their reaction is (so they'll tell me if this is going too far, but I think I'm pretty safe :-) But otherwise this is going to stay confined to my hard drive. I'm going to say that probably this time next year, or maybe a bit before then, is when the season will be ripe to share this with everyone. Gotta get a few other things lined up in the meantime. If/when I publish this I'll make a permanent link to it in the Recent Hightlights section on the right so nobody will miss it.

Trust me, I ain't joshin' y'all: this will probably make you honk with laughter. Find out what it is... sometime in 2006!

Sunday, November 13, 2005

Disney has gone to the dogs

Was doing a random traipse through the blogs and found this one-sheet posted at The Hollywood Blacklist:
Dear Lord, they just can't leave well enough alone, can they? Earlier this year I reported that a remake of Tron is in the pipeline at Disney. Now they've gone and done this. What next: a redo of Song of the South starring 50 Cent?

BTW, the original The Shaggy Dog is a pretty funny movie. I saw it years ago, and not long afterward I happened to catch its sequel The Shaggy D.A.. The original stars Fred MacMurray, who played the scoutmaster in that movie Follow Me, Boys! that I wrote about awhile back. Good, classic Disney fare that doesn't need any mangling by Michael Eisner.

Hollywood Blacklist is also reporting that the trailer for The DaVinci Code is going to be attached to Peter Jackson's King Kong next month. That'll probably be the closest I ever get to anything relating to The DaVinci Code. For my thoughts on that - and some info on a MUCH more intriguing story regarding that kind of stuff - read this post from this past January.

Bill Gates gets DOOMed

What you are about to see has never before been witnessed by the general public. Until now.

Windows 95 had been out for barely two months when Microsoft held their Judgement Day event on October 30th, 1995. Hosted on the Microsoft campus in Redmond, Washington, it was a massive showcase of Windows 95 as a gaming platform, and an opportunity for third-party game developers to hawk the products they would soon be rolling out. Microsoft's garage and cafeteria were converted into a "haunted mansion", with each attendee given their own section to decorate. It sounds like it was a pretty wild time...

...Among the attendees were LucasArts, Activsion, and of course, iD Software. Outside, 12 massive guillotines were set around the exits. Activision created a small jungle section to promote the new Pitfall for Sega Genesis. A company called Zombie created a big metal sphere that shot out blue electricity. iD, however no to be outdone (much to Microsoft's dismay) hired the shock-rock band G.W.A.R. to create their set. It was an eight foot tall vagina with dildo teeth. Inside, two members of G.W.A.R. dressed in fur and raw meat attacked passerby's with rubber penises.
Alex St. John - one of the creators of Microsoft's DirectX - had something that would upstage even the boys at iD. Here's what went down, as described in the book Masters of Doom:
As the lights fell, a video screen lowered above the stage; It was time for the main event. The crowd cheered as the Doom's familiar corridors began to roll. But it was not the Doom soldier chasing the demons, it was... Bill Gates! Microsoft's fearless leader was superimposed running inside the game in a long black trench coat and brandishing a shotgun. Gates stopped running and addressed the crowd about Windows 95 as a gaming platform: A platform that could deliver cutting-edge multimedia experiences like Doom. But no sooner that he begun that an Imp monster from the game jumped out, through voice over, asked Gates for an autograph [sic]. Gates responded by raising his shotgun and blowing the beast to gory chunks. 'Don't interrupt me while I'm speaking', he said, then finished his speech. At the end, the screen went black with blood, only to be replaced with the familiar Microsoft phrase 'Who do you want to execute today?'.
Until this past week, NO ONE outside of Microsoft and those who attended Judgement Day had ever seen this video. But a few days ago the guys at Reel Splatter got in touch with Alex St. John, asking if it would be possible to watch this video of Bill Gates running around inside Doom... and St. John sent it to them! Click here to watch Bill Gates in a trenchcoat blast away a Former Human with his boomstick!

Saturday, November 12, 2005

About that Star Wars bonus DVD...

Chad Austin is asking about something that so far I don't think anyone else has hit on...
Hey Chris, I was watching "The Story of Star Wars" Bonus DVD that came with the Revenge of the Sith DVD from Wal-Mart and I was thinking....how could C-3PO narrate the story of Anakin Skywalker if he had his memory wiped at the end of Episode III?!?
Chad's right. If anyone should be telling this story, it's Artoo, not that blabbermouth protocol droid. Guess that memory wipe didn't take too well huh?

Friday, November 11, 2005

All six Star Wars movies... simultaneously


Shades of William S. Burroughs: a Star Wars fan named WeirdHat is watching all six movies at the same time. Interesting experiment in media psychology, to be sure. This guy is picking out some interesting patterns in the chaos that is the saga. Thanks to Kyle Williams for spotting this one.

Dear President Bush: you're here to HONOR the fallen, not keep them coming

Bush took the occassion of Veterans Day to attack critics of his war in Iraq.

I know that there are some people who are against this war strictly because its driving proponent happens to be of another political party, but those are too few and far between to justify attacking EVERYONE who is against this conflict. Some of us are against it because it has no clearly defined end-goal, because from the very beginning it has been based on dubious - and even non-existing - rationales, and simply because it has resulted in the MEANINGLESS deaths of more than two thousand American lives and still counting. Those precious men and women went off and died in another land and their sacrifice ultimately stood for NOTHING. They didn't die "protecting our liberty".

They died because a damaged little coward of a man - who has spent his life too scared to do any fighting on his own - decided that his own selfish ambitions weighed greater in the scales than did the greater good of the country that he swore an oath to serve.

He never had a real reason to instigate this war then, and he has no reason to continue it now. Instead he exploits what is supposed to be a solemn moment of reflection to make a political attack.

I don't know about you, but I have a lot of veterans in my family. Some of them have served in most of the conflicts of the past sixty years of American history. One fought at Iwo Jima. Two were in Korea. Serving this country is something that has a long history among my kin. And I'm mad as hell that the Coward-In-Chief would abuse a day consecrated to them for his own selfish reasons.

But then, this is just part of the pattern that's been his entire life, isn't it?

All of you who have supported him: I will be laughing at you ten years from now, when you'll be too ashamed to admit that you ever stood behind George W. Bush.