fantasy

What if the Palpatine we saw in Star Wars Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker was not the “real” Palpatine at all?  What if he was some kind of replica without an iota of Palpatine/Sidious’s spirit whatsoever?

There is precedent for such a notion.

In Timothy Zahn’s two-part “Hand of Thrawn” novel duology from the late Nineties, the galaxy hears whispers about the return of Grand Admiral Thrawn.  Thrawn in the still-venerable expanded universe, you may recall, was killed toward the end of The Last Command.  The galaxy thought he was dead.  But he prophesied that he would return in ten years’ time if he ever was thought to have died.

Long story short, it turns out that at Thrawn’s hidden fortress (see what I did there?) in the Unknown Regions, the grand admiral had prepared a clone of himself.  It had been in stasis all that time.  Just waiting ...

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 See?  I really do know how to write an op-ed piece that doesn’t honk off many readers!

This edition of Elon’s student newspaper The Pendulum came out right before spring break 1999.  I didn’t want to be on the cusp of that and deliver something that would be overly provocative.  There had been an article for Christmas a few months earlier and this new one needed to be on a happy note too.

So here it is, from two months before the premiere of Star Wars Episode I.  Note the special photo we used for the essay: me brandishing a toy lightsaber and wearing the helmet from a Darth Vader mask.  Click on the pic to enlarge and read!

 

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 Look, I love Star Wars as much as anyone (maybe far too much more than anyone.  But what came out of the Disney Investor Event a few days ago worries me:

Ten… count ’em TEN… new Star Wars projects going on for the next few years.  Those are in addition to The Mandalorian.  Most of these are likewise going to be streaming series on the Disney+ service.  Ahsoka and Rangers of the New Republic are said to be spinoffs of The Mandalorian.  We knew that Obi-Wan Kenobi was coming (it begins filming next month) as well as the series about Andor from the movie Rogue One.  Ditto the animated series about the Bad Batch (introduced in the final season of The Clone Wars).

Do we really need… or were we at all asking for… a series about young Lando Calrissian though?  No offense to Donald ...

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There is a rumor… rumor mind ya so take this with an industrial sized salt lick… that somewhere in the Disney Vault there rests a cut of Star War Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker that is drastically different and better than what was released theatrically last Christmas.  This cut was allegedly assembled by George Lucas: the Maker himself.  This edit supposedly adds new material, removes several elements we saw in The Rise of Skywalker‘s theater version and perhaps even has a new ending.  The result is a film that is at least forty percent altered from the original cinematic release.

It is supposed to fix the problems that The Rise of Skywalker has, as well as many of the problems that the entire sequel trilogy is rife with.

It is the hope of many fans that “the George Lucas Cut” – IF it exists at all – will ...

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Many of you  by now are hearing the rumors: that Kathleen Kennedy is on the way out as matriarch of the Star Wars franchise.  That the operation will soon be run by either Jon Favreau or Dave Filoni.  That the entire sequel trilogy is going to be scrapped and “re-made”.

Personally, I doubt that last one is going to happen.  Because I can’t but think of all the little girls I’ve seen dressed as Rey for the premiere of the past few Star Wars movies.  Rey is a true heroine to them.  Heck, she is for me too.  But especially to young girls who look to Rey as a role model.  Not I or anyone else should take that away from them.  Besides, Star Wars was ripe for a female character on par with Luke Skywalker and young Obi-Wan Kenobi.  Rey fits the role perfectly.

But I won’t deny that ...

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What if Game of Thrones came out a decade and a half earlier, in 1995?  Back when the style of fantasy television was dictated by shows like Hercules: The Legendary Journeys and Xena: Warrior Princess.  What would it have been like?

Very likely, something like this…




So if Sam Raimi had made Game of Thrones back in the day, who would Kevin Sorbo have played? My guess is Eddard Stark.  Maybe a shaven-headed Bruce Campbell as Varys, or at least Petyr Baelish.

And Lucy Lawless?  No doubt about it: Cersei.

Kudos to YouTube user “hunterlsanders” for such a great piece of work!...

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Last spring I added a new vice to my list of stuff worth spending valuable time on. I haven’t spoken about it on this blog yet but those who know me best will tell you that I have become a huge fan of A Song of Ice and Fire (AKA Game of Thrones), the fantasy novel series by George R.R. Martin. Kristen gave me a Barnes & Noble gift card for my birthday last year and I used it to buy A Game of Thrones. When June rolled around I wound up taking A Feast for Crows along on our trip to Oregon. And just before Christmas I finished the most recent book, A Dance with Dragons.

I am digging the heck out of this series! My three absolutely favorite characters are Jon Snow, Arya Stark and Tyrion Lannister. Especially Tyrion: it’s impossible to get enough ...

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Awright, who else is seeing this, and thought that we must be getting a Star Wars/Hellraiser crossover…?

StarWars.com revealed the image earlier today. Deathtroopers by Joe Schreiber is the first ever true horror story set in the galaxy far, far away (no, I’m not counting the “Galaxy of Fear” books either). The novel is scheduled for release later this year, fittingly enough just before Halloween....

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That’s certainly a different take on the saga. Yeah I remember the “Galaxy of Fear” books too but those were mostly done to cash in on the success of the Goosebumps series. To date there hasn’t been a serious attempt at the horror genre within the Star Wars mythology. Until next November when Deathtroopers comes out. Author Joe Schreiber announced it on his blog and describes it as “in the vein of The Shining and Alien, with a little dose of William Gibson mixed in”.

Sounds groovy. Can’t wait to read it 🙂...

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At this moment Spike TV is broadcasting Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back. It’s leading in to network premiere of Return of the Jedi later tonight.

Okay, I’ve watched The Empire Strikes Back… Lord only knows how many times over the years, all the way back to when it first came out in theaters in 1980. And there is one thing about this movie that has always, always bugged me…

In the “betrayal” scene where Lando is taking Han, Leia and Chewie through Cloud City, the door opens and there’s Darth Vader seated at the far end of a fully-loaded banquet table. Han shoots, Vader deflects the blaster bolts with his hand then forces Han’s gun to fly into his outstretched palm. Then Vader says “We would be honored if you would join us.” Boba Fett enters from stage right behind Vader, Lando says “I’m sorry…” ...

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