taxes

Chris Knight's avatar

Ten years ago this summer I went to work as a full-time reporter. It was with a… well let’s just say they don’t make outfits like this anymore. Probably one of the last of the newspapers with that old-school journalistic ‘tude. Anyhoo, my very first assignment was to investigate the budget that the General Assembly had proposed for North Carolina’s next fiscal term.

A full decade later and I still get fits of anger just thinking about the crap I found in those hundreds of pages of monetary monstrosity that I picked through line by agonizing line.

(A space shuttle launch complex for North Carolina? Really? And how much money did we spend trying to put that here when there’s already a good working one in Florida?)

Even if it’s a long drive and a fair swim away from the Tarheel State, what fellow journalist/blogger and friend of The ...

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“We know who you are.” That’s the message from the Pennsylvania Department of Revenue in this spot – paid for with the tax dollars of Pennsylvania citizens – that obviously has but one purpose: to SCARE us.

Who exactly is “we” here? And who is “you” intended to represent?

Has our government really become so divorced from the people it’s supposed to be comprised of and represent, that it has now resorted to active measures of intimidation?

Here. See for yourself…

This is not freedom, people. This is blatant tyranny. This is everything that the Founders and too many others since their time have fought against and far more than that. And if I were a resident of Pennsylvania, I would be mad as #&@$ at the state government there for this. It indicates way too much else gone screwy, not just in Pennsylvania but across this country....

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All good things must come to an end. Which as more than one person has noted, means that my jokes are cursed to live forever! 😛

You know what I like most about April Fools Day? It’s that my birthday is March 31st. So for me it’s like a two-day long extravaganza of hilarity and thanks to this blog, I get to share that good-natured nuttiness with a wide audience!

Okay well anyhoo, obviously this year’s April Fools Day on The Knight Shift was nothing like last year’s infamous “Johnny Robertson arrested at the Vatican” stunt that saw this blog slammed with visits from such places as the U.S. State Department and Vatican City itself. This time, I wanted to do something a bit quieter, but no less funny. And as things turned out I wound up running three prank stories on this blog.

Let’s count ’em off…

1. “Governor ...

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What. The. #&@$ ?!?!?

Just saw on the website for the Raleigh News & Observer that Governor Bev Perdue is talking with members of the General Assembly about levying a tax on all NASCAR-related sales within the state of North Carolina.

I say again: What. The. #&@$ ?!?!?

According to the article, if enacted into law the tickets for NASCAR stock car races will have a 10% tax imposed upon them. And it’s not just that, friends and neighbors: the NASCAR merchandise is going to be hit extra-hard too! Want a scale-model replica of “King” Richard Petty’s famous Number 43 car, or a calendar highlighting Dale Earnhardt Jr.’s career? Well in addition to the regular sales tax it’s gonna have 5% extra added to the final price as well.

I can guess why Governor Perdue might be trying to do this. North Carolina is already the most-taxed state in ...

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Obamacare should be sufficient proof that our federal government is “deem ‘n pass”-essed.

I demand that Nancy Pelosi give me a lifetime supply of short-sleeve shirts. After all, the Constitution guarantees a “right to bare arms”.

Obamacare is going to be a violation of the separation of church and state, because it violates my religious freedom on grounds that I believe that having insurance is a form of gambling.

Okay, seriously…

This will be the absolutely worst legislation passed in Congress in American history, if President Obama gets to sign it.

And incidentally, there is enormously strong historical evidence that socialized medicine would not be the first time that the politicians in Washington have screwed us over with “deem and pass”.

(Hint: Google about “Philander Knox”)....

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A few days ago two “dark-suited IRS agents” – described by Aaron Zeff as “deadly serious, very aggressive, very condescending” – arrived at Harv’s Metro Car Wash in Sacramento, California: a business establishment owned by Mr. Zeff.

So what was the Internal Revenue Service doing at Harv’s Metro Car Wash, you may ask?

Here’s the story from the Sacramento Bee…

The letter that was hand-delivered to Zeff’s on-site manager showed the amount of money owed to the feds was … 4 cents.

Inexplicably, penalties and taxes accruing on the debt – stemming from the 2006 tax year – were listed as $202.31, leaving Harv’s with an obligation of $202.35.

Zeff, who also owns local parking lots and is the president of the Midtown Business Association, finds the situation a bit comical.

“It’s hilarious,” he says, “that two people hopped in a car and came down here for just 4

...
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The subject of Joseph Stack – the man who did a kamikaze attack with his private plane on an IRS office in Austin, Texas this past week – came up last night while a friend and I were getting a bite to eat after seeing Shutter Island (an excellent movie, incidentally).

For whatever it’s worth (‘cuz hey, I’m just a blogger on the Intertubes) I think that Mr. Stack was a very troubled individual, and I would no doubt hold to that assessment even if I had not read his bizarre and rambling screed that he posted on a website before burning down his own house and then flying off the brink of madness.

I also think that it’s very, very inappropriate for anyone to ascribe Stack as being typical of a political ideology. In the past few days I’ve seen self-professed liberals claim that Stack echoed the sentiments of ...

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Here’s the call for quotes that the IRS has put out. The agency says that the shotguns are for its “Criminal Investigation Division”.

I could understand (kinda) investigating crime, insomuch as I do acknowledge that the IRS is still a legal entity despite my beliefs on taxation. But there’s a far difference between investigating a possible criminal and approaching said possible criminal in a way that entails possessing means of self-defense if necessary.

Or I guess it could mean that the IRS is going to attempt to make war on moonshiners. But after what happened to Popcorn Sutton last year, y’all can be assured of where my sympathies in that would be....

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Bev Perdue – also known on this blog as “WORST GOVERNOR EVER!” – has done it again. ‘Course to be fair she had help from North Carolina’s lawmakers. Amazon.com has stopped doing business with all of its affiliates in this state: a consequence of, as Amazon.com puts it, “the unconstitutional tax collection scheme expected to be passed any day now by the North Carolina state legislature (the General Assembly) and signed by the governor.”

This is already the most taxed state in the southeast. Piling on more taxes is not a smart move by any measure. But sadly folks, this state’s head honchos have long been drunk on wild spending and are desperate for any way they can find to keep their mad orgy going.

North Carolina, ladies and gentlemen: “The California of the Eastern Seaboard”....

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