EIGHT HUNDRED AND TWENTY-SIX PAGES OF ADVERTISING CIRCULARS in today’s newspaper. That’s the pic of all of ’em in a heap on the living room floor.

(And if you didn’t get the reference in the title, click here.)

826 pages. That is… just wrong…

We used to have a cocker spaniel named Bridget. Every morning we would let her go outside and she would run out to the end of the driveway and pick up the day’s newspaper. Bridget would grasp it with her mouth and come prancing back to the front door with her head held high, and she wouldn’t dare let you have the paper until you “paid” her with a doggy treat. If people think that animals don’t have a concept of capitalism and property, then Bridget would have proven them wrong, but I digress…

Anyhoo, every day of the year, Bridget did her job ...