The Last Jedi

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GeekTyrant, one of my favorite websites, reminds us that this week is the tenth anniversary of the release of the trailer for Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens.  I will never forget that night.  I was reloading YouTube every ten seconds, waiting for the trailer to publish.  And when it finally dropped…

I guarantee you that I watched that thing at least a dozen times before going to bed.  Oh sure, there had been the teaser earlier that April, but this was the full-blown serious look at what the first chapter of Star Wars’s “sequel trilogy” was offering.  And it was glorious!  Everything about that trailer was spot-on perfect: the glimpses, the dialogue, the music… just completely epic.

Here it is if you haven’t watched it in awhile (or if you’ve never had the pleasure of seeing it at all until now):

It had been seven ...

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There is a rumor… rumor mind ya so take this with an industrial sized salt lick… that somewhere in the Disney Vault there rests a cut of Star War Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker that is drastically different and better than what was released theatrically last Christmas.  This cut was allegedly assembled by George Lucas: the Maker himself.  This edit supposedly adds new material, removes several elements we saw in The Rise of Skywalker‘s theater version and perhaps even has a new ending.  The result is a film that is at least forty percent altered from the original cinematic release.

It is supposed to fix the problems that The Rise of Skywalker has, as well as many of the problems that the entire sequel trilogy is rife with.

It is the hope of many fans that “the George Lucas Cut” – IF it exists at all – will ...

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Many of you  by now are hearing the rumors: that Kathleen Kennedy is on the way out as matriarch of the Star Wars franchise.  That the operation will soon be run by either Jon Favreau or Dave Filoni.  That the entire sequel trilogy is going to be scrapped and “re-made”.

Personally, I doubt that last one is going to happen.  Because I can’t but think of all the little girls I’ve seen dressed as Rey for the premiere of the past few Star Wars movies.  Rey is a true heroine to them.  Heck, she is for me too.  But especially to young girls who look to Rey as a role model.  Not I or anyone else should take that away from them.  Besides, Star Wars was ripe for a female character on par with Luke Skywalker and young Obi-Wan Kenobi.  Rey fits the role perfectly.

But I won’t deny that ...

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WARNING:  This post deals with matters pertaining to Star Wars Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker, which hit theaters less than 48 hours ago.  There WILL be spoilers openly discussed so if you aren’t one to have the experience of seeing the movie for yourself ruined for you (take the hint: go see it, now now now!) don’t read what I’m about to write.  It is ONLY for those who have already seen The Rise of Skywalker and want to discuss a fairly major element of that movie and the entire “sequel” trilogy as a whole.

No, seriously.  I mean it.  Stop reading if you don’t want The Rise of Skywalker spoiled for you.

Still here?

Okay, let it be on your own head.  Here we go…

Let’s talk about Snoke.  The late Supreme Leader of the First Order who was infamously bisected by his main boy ...

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It’s Supreme Leader Snoke set to “Just A Gigolo” by David Lee Roth! You’ll never look at your Star Wars action figures the same way again…

The idea has been accreting throughout my neurons since at least April. Guess I had no choice but to do something about it. Made on my iPad Pro, took about 11 hours not counting breaks for dinner and playing with Tammy the Pup. Finished just before 4 this morning.

Dear Dave and Disney: please don’t sue me!!!!!...

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Okay, this is probably going to fanwank me into utter oblivion but since today is the quasi-holiday of May the Fourth and in light of the festivities here are some thoughts – that have been nagging at a lot of us these past few months – about Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi…
Taken at face value the internal chronology makes little to NO sense whatsoever. There is ENORMOUS incongruity between the events of the Rey and Luke, and the Resistance fleet, and Finn and Rose, and even Kylo Ren and Snoke. And it’s bugged the mynocks out of me… until I began studying this film alongside The Force Awakens and now… it kinda jibes pretty well after all.
(Mind ya though, these are the words of a maniac who once upon a time composed a mini-doctoral thesis explaining away midi-chlorians. So parse all of this as
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STAR WARS, n.

A never-ending epic mythology loved by many, would be betrayed and killed for by everybody, and is agreed upon by none.

— from The Devil’s Dictionary by Ambrose Bierce (1906),

    appended to by Christopher Knight (2018)




The Force Awakens.  Rogue One.  The Last Jedi.  And in six short weeks Solo…


Clearly, much has happened in the past two and a half years since this blogger – said by some to be more enthusiastic than might be healthy – has posted anything at all about Star Wars.  And that last time was about The Star Wars Holiday Special!


Little wonder that a few had written e-mails asking if I was still alive or if I had gone Amish or something.


Happily, I can sincerely report that my love for the Star Wars saga is still there.  As much as
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